Issue: 20090401

Wednesday, April 1, 2009
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Saturday, July 26, 2014
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Articles
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Front Cover
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SETH ROGEN NUDE? NOT QUITE
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ABSOLUT SPIRITS CO.
ABSOLUT MANGO
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Playbill
PLAYBILL
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Working for the Man: It beats not working at all, but it's a grind. You're not paranoid if you think the Man is out to get you; you're merely perceptive. Look at Barry Bonds, maybe the greatest slugger in the history of base­ball. Jonathan Littman has been follow­ing Bonds for years and has witnessed a slow-motion takedown that now feels a hell of a lot like scapegoating. In The Per­secution of Barry Bonds Littman tells the real story, and it's not what you've been seeing on ESPN. Getting screwed by the Man is bad; getting it from the Very Bad Man is worse. See Liars, Cheats & Thieves for a catalog of Very Bad Men. Playboy Interview subject Seth Rogen is playing the Man—or a wannabe Man in a mall cop's uniform—in his latest film, Observe and Report. It's his second comedic cop role (he played Officer Michaels in Super-bad), which is ironic for an actor who plays a stoner in every other film. (In fact, wasn't Officer Michaels a pot-smoking cop, if memory serves? But then memory's the first thing to go, isn't it?) Articles and
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Mazda Motor
MAZDA
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Playboy Afterhours
Hayley Marie Norman
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A Mercedes pulls up to a cafe on Melrose Avenue, and star power steps out. She's an ex­ceedingly groovy chick, rocking a retro Afro, much cleavage and bell-bottoms. This would be our lunch date—actress Hayley Marie Norman, best known for now as model num­ber 25 on Deal or No Deal. The hair is her calling card and a deliberate one. Her idol is 1970s blaxploitation queen Pam Grier, and Hayley dreams of playing Grier's vengeful lead char­acter in a remake of Coffy. "Pam is the epitome of what a woman is to me," says Hayley, who at 36-26-36 is nothing to sneeze at. "She's a curvy, gorgeous woman who's not apolo­getic about who she is. She's strong, sexy and elegant, but she can hold her own. In Coffy, to protect herself she hides razor blades in her Afro. That is so badass." Further evidence of the Grier complex peeks out of her low-rise jeans: Af roed versions of the famous mud-flap girl are tattooed on each hip. "One is me," she explains. "The other is Pam." Until her dream gig arrives, Hayley is getting outside the Deal or No Deal box with plenty of acting. Her movies include the re­cent cheerleader comedy Fired Up! and the upcoming action film Nephilim. But on the Starz series Crash, Hayley is really turning up the heat. She plays Justice, a bad girl who seduces one of the male leads. "At first I struggled with doing things that were a little sexier," she admits. "Now I've embraced it. I don't mind sexy if there's intelligence beneath it. It's 2009. Golden Globe winner Kate Winslet is so sexy, and she's done nudity. I've done a couple of nude scenes on Crash, and it was liberat­ing, even cathartic. I did my own lit­tle Kate Winslet." Naked Kate Wins­let with an Afro—there's a fantasy even we've never conjured before.
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After Hours
Will the Next Eminem Please Stand Up?
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After five years in the studio Eminem is finally gearing up for the spring release of Relapse. Has his long absence left the door open for a Caucasian challenger? We did a microphone check on lyrical pretenders to the throne.
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After Hours
Nice Twits, Olivia
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Twitter.com is a website that (among other things) lets ordinary guys keep tabs on hot babes. Mischa Barton, Tina Fey and a host of porn stars post there, but our fa­vorite is Olivia Munn. Chart her every move at twitter .com/oliviamunn. You know you want this:
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After Hours
Survival Guide: April
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(if any) to the recent U.S. economic crisis? It sure took that British pound down a peg. The Financial Forecast Center cautions that the pound will surge in May, June and July, so take advantage of the good rate now. Smoke up. It's always 4:20 somewhere, and on 4/20 it's 4:20 everywhere, all day. Even at 4:21 it's still 4:20 on 4/20. Whoa. Get some rest. You'll need your wits about you for Sleep Dealer, the best screen sci-fi since The Matrix. The Mexi­can film is subtitled, so you'll have to stick with it—at least until the 19:06 mark. That's when caliente Leonor Varela enters. Attention grabbed. ____
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Skechers
SKECHERS
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Table of Contents
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CONTENTS
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Camelsnus
SNUS
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Schwarzkopf & Henkel
THICKER FULLER HAIR
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Notes and News
THE WORLD OF PLAYBOY
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HEF SIGHTINGS, MANSION FROLICS AND NIGHTLIFE NOTES
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Notes And News
BLACK TIE AND LINGERIE
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
A BANNER YEAR
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Couldn't you make it easier on us and crown 12 co-Playmates of the Year (Playboy's Playmate Review, January)? Jack Holsombeck Durham, North Carolina
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
THE HEFNER BOYS
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It is a pleasure to meet Marston and Cooper Hefner; before their January 20Q_, I hadn't known they existed. I expected them to be spoiled, snotty and holier-than-anybody, simply because they can be, but they come off as intelligent, respectful, well-spoken and mature. Their thoughtful answers seem to be the result of quality parenting.
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
BRANSON POWER
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As a former United Steelworkers union local president, I believe CEOs would be well served to stop crying about labor and take a page out of Richard Branson's management book (Playboy Interview, Jan­uary). They should instruct their man­agers to provide employees with a living wage, good health care and safe work­ing conditions and to be fair regarding discipline and seniority. Workers would
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
Hooters Heaven
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I thoroughly enjoyed Joe Queenan's article about his attempt during a cross­country trip to eat only at Hooters res­taurants {The Great Hooters Road Trip, January). I can only imagine the fun he had, not to mention the intestinal dis­tress. Queenan wondered if there were any Hooters in Montana, and indeed there is one, right here in Missoula. Since this is the home of the University of Montana, we have plenty of volup­tuous vixens waiting to serve him on his next trip to Big Sky Country.
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
ELECTRIC ELECTRA
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Pam Anderson is a playboy favorite, but give me Carmen Electra (Icon, January) any day. She has it all, from head to toe.
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
THE 55, REVISED
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Thank you for recognizing Alfred Kin-sey as the most important figure in sex of the past 55 years (The 55 Most Impor­tant People in Sex, January). We agree. What playboy readers may not know is that the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction is alive and well and still conducting research. We also maintain a collection of all things sexual—film, art, photography and other materials—spanning ages and cultures. Our new website, kinseyconfidential.org, offers podcasts and answers to common sexual questions. We are hopeful the institute will continue Kinsey's work for generations to come.
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
SOUND BITES
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Playboy Interview's Greatest Hits (Janu­ary) is informative and entertaining, but it's surprising you couldn't find room for Ayn Rand, whose March 1964 interview transformed many readers' lives and thinking, including my own. My choice for the quintessential Rand quote would have been "Collectivism, as an intellec­tual power and a moral ideal, is dead. But freedom and individualism, and their political expression, capitalism, have not yet been discovered."
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
A FOND FAREWELL
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Christopher Hitchens needs to get real: Richard Nixon is the worst president ever (Playbill, January)? Not even close. He's third, Ronald Reagan is second, and George W. Bush takes the booby prize. Later in the issue, in What W Did, Hitch-ens writes, "The U.S.'s very existence is incompatible with totalitarianism." The Native Americans we murdered and the blacks and Chinese we enslaved prob­ably would not agree. Now that we are so invested in China, shouldn't we put pres­sure on its leaders to stop human-rights abuses? Is this nation in such debt that we dare not piss anyone off?
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Letters to the Editor
Deat Playboy
HAPPY MEMORIES
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As a kid, I used to "borrow" my older brother's ih.wbovs and show them off to all my buddies. So 1 enjoyed your senti­mental journey through the decades (55 Beautiful Years, January). With pinups
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Rocktherabbit
JACK DANIEL'S
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Jack Daniel Distillery
Whiskey
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Playboy
ABSOLUTE POKER
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ALL AMERICAN STETSON
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Aaron Paul's Hollywood Story
Aaron Paul's Hollywood Story
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With roles on two of TVs best shows, Aaron Paul is certainly on the way up. Both of his characters are young men with issues: On HBO's Big Love he plays a disillusioned former Mormon, and on AMC's Breaking Bad he plays a meth dealer. We asked about his own struggles during his 12-year journey from Boise to prime time.
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Alexia Lee
Alexia Lee
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PLAYBOY: Where do you work? ALEXIA: I'm a surgical assistant for an oral surgeon. We perform oral biopsies, jaw reconstructions and implants. That's dental implants— not the other kind of implants. PLAYBOY: What role do you play? ALEXIA: I prep the patients for sur­gery, sterilize the instruments, hand the doctor his tools during the proce­dure and help the patient in post-op. PLAYBOY: Do you have a favorite den­tal instrument?
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Masters Drinking Game
Masters Drinking Game
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No American sporting event is more twee than the Masters, and the forced reverence in CBS's coverage can make even die-hard golf fans cringe. We're not saying don't watch it-just consider doing so with drinks in hand: •When Jim Nantz says "a tradition like none other," take a sip of fine cabernet. -When he mentions loblolly pine, finish your glass of cabernet. -When David Feherty says some­thing quaintly Irish, do a shot of Jameson. •When Nantz calls Peter Oosterhuis "Oostie," chug a Bass pale ale. "If Oostie mentions loblolly pine, pour Bass into your wine and down it. -Down a snifter of brandy every time the camera cuts to Butler Cabin. >If Oostie is in Butler Cabin, pour Bass into your brandy and down it. «If Oostie and Feherty are in Butler Cabin, mix Jameson, Bass and brandy and attempt to drink it. -If Oostie and Feherty are naked in a loblolly pine, congratula­tions—you have passed out and are having a disturbing dream.
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After Hours
I Love You, Man
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Stephen Rebello
In the hilariously sharp 1 Love You, Man, Paul Rudd is a buttoned-down real estate agent so strapped for guy friends that he auditions strangers to be the best man at his upcoming wedding. In this big, rau­cous comedy directed by John Hamburg (Along Came Polly), Rudd bonds so quick­ly with wild man Jason Segel that it seri­ously dings his relationship with his hot fiancee, Rashida Jones. "This is about two guys who wear their emotions on their sleeves, like my friends and me— schlubby and not macho at all," says Rudd. "Jason and I laughed like school­girls making it, because we're so far down from alpha males, we're delta males. We are perfect for a bromance movie." Segel, who matches Rudd yuk for yuk in the flick, adds, "Our own bromance actually started while we were hanging at the pool bar in bathing suits during Forgetting Sar­ah Marshall. For I Love You, Man, Paul
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Reviews
SPY VS. SPY:
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Julia Roberts and Clive Owen play spies in Duplicity, but will it be a blockbuster? Probably not. Their previous screen teaming, Closer, made just $34 million domestically. Their most recent successes are as supporting players^ Roberts's last movie to break $100 million was 2004's Ocean * Twelve; Owen's was 2002's The Bourne Identity.
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After Hours
Forbidden Hollywood Collection Vol. Three: William Wellman at Warner Bros.
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Bryan Reesman
ace World War I pilot, director William "Wild Bill" Weltman fearlessly tackled controver­sial subjects in pre-Code Hol­lywood. These six films—in­cluding The Purchase Price (pictured), Frisco Jenny and Midnight Mary—feature a drug-addicted war vet, two toxic love triangles and a mad­am whose adopted son turns DA and seeks to destroy her business. A Richard
200050_20090401_000033.xml
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After Hours
Quantum of Solace
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Robert B. DeSalvo
sequel, james Bono (uaniel Craig) seeks vengeance for his lover's death and finds a kindred spirit in a revenge-driven woman. More Bourne than Bond, this 22nd 007 outing is the most action-packed and the highest grossing. Best "Another Way to Die" music vMco. (BO) VVV% Roberta. OeSatm
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After Hours
Slumdog Millionaire
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Buzz McClain
winning epic Is about an orphaned Mum-bai tea server who competes on the Indian version of Who Wants to Be a Mil­lionaire while trying to reunite with Ms lost love. Intensely personal, it fills tlM senses with pungent visuals. Best ex-Director Danny Boyle's frank com­mentary. (BD) yVVV -BuzzMcClain
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After hours
Tease Frame
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Alluring English actress Emily Blunt is probably best known to American audiences as the scene-stealer in The Devil Wears Prada and for her part in the doomed lesbian romance My Summer of Love (pictured). See her now in Sunshine Cleaning, in which she and Amy Adams star as sisters who start a successful crime-scene cleanup business.
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After Hours
Now Showing:
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Russell Crowe is in a State of
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After Hours
Resident Evil 5
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Scott Jones
This latest installment of the splatterific horror franchise is available for both 360 and PS3 and moves the action to a vaguely African setting (as opposed to the vaguely Eastern European environs of RE4). In it, we follow the series' original protagonist, Chris Redfield, as he squares off against yet another batch of former humans who've been mutated by a hideous new bio-terror virus. This time he's brought trim, sexy Sheva along for the ride, adding the possi­bility of co-op play to the mix. Unfortunately, though she's easy on the eyes, her presence subverts the signature ambience of the series: a queasy, horrifying loneliness. That said, the co­op play works quite well, and mowing down waves of machete-wielding creeps still brings much joy, even more with a pal. The controls have been modified to bring them in line with other modern third-person shooters, but the pace is still very Resident Evil: plodding, menac­ing and brutal. VVV'/i -Scott Jones
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After Hours
PUZZLE QUEST: GALACTRIX (360, DS, PC)
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Scott Alexander
DS, PC) The original Puzzle Quest breathed new, virulently addictive life into gem-matching puzzles by wrapping them in swords and sorcery. Galactrix takes things to outer space with new modes and a hexagonal playing field that requires rewiring your strategic thinking. VVV'A -Scott Alexander
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After Hours
Shoot to Kill
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Killzone 2 (PS3) isn't just the best shooter ever on the PS3, it's also the most graphically im­pressive console game ever made, the one that finally pays off your PS3 purchase. Now go kill [yourself some Helghast
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After Hours
The Roots of Rhythm
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Leopold Froehlich
Where do new musical styles come from? Usually it takes an assembly of special talent in one place. Rock and roll busted out of Memphis in the 1950s, and jazz began in fin de siecle New Orleans. Dub music, which started in Jamaica in the late 1960s, was born out of necessity and technical opportunity. Enterprising pro­ducers cut basic rhythm tracks for different artists to sing over. Eventually these disassembled riddim tracks took on lives of their own. In 1958 Vincent and Patricia Chin opened their studio at 17 North Parade in down­town Kingston. Studio 17 quickly became a favorite with reggae producers like Lee "Scratch" Perry and Niney the Observer for its distinctly taut "ghetto" sound. With the crack rhythm section of Sly Dunbar and Lloyd Parks, it's no wonder 17 North Parade became ground zero for some of the most powerful music of the 20th century. The first dub recordings were made there by engineer Errol Thompson and producer Clive Chin. To celebrate the studio's 50th anniversary, VP Records has created the 17 North Parade imprint to reissue classics of Kings­ton music, from Dennis Brown to Freddie McGregor, along with an amazing series of anthologies of reggae rarities. It's surprising how up-to-date these recordings sound and how vibrant the music remains today. If you want to learn more about Jamaican music, Randy's 50th Anniversary anthology is a good place to start. If you're already a devotee, check out Joe Gibbs's Scorchers From the Mighty Two. —Leopold Froehtich
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After Hours
HALO WARS
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Scott Stein
(360) Unlike previous
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After Hours
What Playboy's Kind of Man Reads
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n our quest to enumerate everything a man should do, see and know, Playboy.com brings you "The Top 20 Books Every Man Must Read." Freako-nomics, Dune and the Army Field Manual—though each has its merits—aren't on it; our list is largely capitat-L Literature. We have stories of war (Michael Herr's Dispatches), poverty (George Orwell's Down and Out in Paris and London) and crime (Raymond Chandler's The Long Goodbye). Antiheroes modern and classic: a boozing Giants fan (Frederick Exley's A Fan's Notes) and a melancholy Dane (Hamlet). And then there are the tough sons of bitches—James Ellroy, Norman Mailer, Hunter S. Thompson and Ernest Hemingway—who are manly but not meatheaded. Haven't read them all? What are you, some kind of pussy?
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After Hours
Seeing the Sites
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Bulletin: There is porn on the In­ternet. And be­hind every porn site are entrepre­neurs with vision and women with
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After Hours
Hooterology
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Playboy Morning Show hosts Andrea Lowell and Kevin Klein know breasts. It's Andrea's job to get hers out and con­vince guests to do the same. Kevin gets to watch. We asked for their toD tit Dicks.
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Playboy's City Guide
Where to Party in New Orleans
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Start off the day at Lafitte's Blacksmith Shop (941 Bourbon Street), one of the best watering holes in America. Intimate, candlelit and far off the Jell-O-shot circuit. Essential drinks: Have a ramos gin fizz and a sazerac at the Napoleon House (500 Chartres Street, napoleonhouse .com). Happy hour: It's not much of a tradition in a city where alcohol is poured around the clock, but the Dungeon (738 Toulouse Street, originaldungeon.com) has a two-for-one special on Thursdays from 10:30 p.m. until dawn. Girls, girls, girls: There's no shortage of beauties in the Crescent City. They're everywhere. Check out Molly's at the Market (1107 Decatur Street, mollysatthemarket.net) after mid­night. Music clubs: Head downriver to Frenchmen Street in the Faubourg Marigny. There are plenty of clubs—from d.b.a. (618 Frenchmen Street, drinkgoodstuff.com) and Blue Nile (532 Frenchmen, bluenilelive.com) to the Spotted Cat (623 Frenchmen)—but the street scene is also fantastic. Don't go too early. Perfect way to end the night: Stroll over to Harrah's (228 Poydras Street, harrahsneworleans .com) and roll some dice at the casino. New Orleans's gam­bling is more laid-back than Vegas's, but that's a good thing. Should you bother with a wink of sleep, the Maison Orleans (904 Iberville Street) is the city's best.
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Playboy City Guides!
PLAYBOY CITY GUIDES!
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The 40th annual New Orleans Jazz & Heritage Festival (April 24-26, April 30-May 3) boasts a s tar lineup of talent. More than Mardi Gras, Jazz Fest has become New Orleans's biggest pa Here's our list of must-sees and must-dos. To see our full range of city guides (and vote for yo-favorite spots), go to playboy.com/cityguides.
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Playboy's City Guide
Nature Calls
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of the Atchafalaya Basin, 90 minutes from Bourbon Street, you feel as if you're on another planet. Alligators and herons are everywhere. Cypress trees tower high, their branches re­flecting on the still water. Simply breathtaking. Airboats are too noisy; try a pontoon-boat tour instead: Annie Miller's Son's (annie-miller.com), A Cajun Man's Swamp Cruise (cajunman .com) and Wetland Tours (wetland tours.com) are all worth the trip.
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Playboy's City Guide
Food of the Gods
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There's no better place on earth for a hungry man than New Orleans. Hang­over breakfast: Start with your choice of either sweet (pecan waffles at the up­town Camellia Grill, 626 South CarroUton Avenue, camelliagriU .net) or savory (fried oysters at Casamen-to's, 4330 Magazine Street, casamentos restaurant.com). Cheap eats: Rule number one: Don't
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Raw Data
RAW DATA
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THE PLAYBOY POLL
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Mantrack
Z Is for Zip
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Nissan's original bargain street rocket gives the big boys a run for their money
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Mantrack
A Little Bit Country
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Baseball and the Consti­tution are the two most American things in the world. Now we the peo­ple can get both in one place with this American Constitution ball ($20, bergino.com). We don't recommend taking it out to the local field (lest you smudge George's signature), but it'll look swanky on your desk.
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Mantrack
Fry, Guy
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Nothing is worse than tail-gating halfway. And there's nothing halfway about tail-gating with a deep fryer on hand. Coleman's Roadtrip FryWell Portable Tabletop Fryer ($160, coleman.com) goes anywhere, runs on pro­pane canisters, heats to 450 degrees Fahrenheit and can fry a pound of food at a time. Fill her with oil, mix up some beer batter and let a thousand fried Twix bars bloom.
200050_20090401_000053.xml
article
24
24
Article
Mantrack
Now Look Here, Sea
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Nautica's Oceans ($49) evokes the idea of the briny deep without actually smell­ing like it. Its strong lemon-tonic top note teases pre-summer freshness, then it's grounded by a body of sea-salt rose and lavender reef. She'll think of cabanas and sex, not seaweed and dead fish.
200050_20090401_000054.xml
article
24
24
Article
Mantrack
Ax Me Anything
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Sounding good on a guitar depends on tuning, tone and chops, you supply the last item, Gibson's new Dark Fire ($3,500, gibson .com) will take care of the rest. This technoshredder features the latest evolution of Gibson's Robot technology, which can take you from a drop D to a modal G in less than a sec­ond. Plus it has multiple pickups (both acoustic and electric) that allow for a stunning variety of tone output, so you can sound like the Edge, Hendrix or just plain you.
200050_20090401_000055.xml
article
24
24
Article
Mantrack
Hack Your Life: Put Facebook to Work
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[no value]
[no value]
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At first glance Facebook may look like just another big, chaotic online party, but it actually contains a surprising number of programs for getting stuff done (facebook .com/applications). Several of these tools exist outside the social networking site as well, but Face-book's inclusive nature makes it an ideal central hub to work from. Think of it as an operating system for your life. Take the Picnik app, which lets you edit, tweak and enhance photos from within your browser. Or Zoho Online Office, which lets you edit, share and col­laborate on documents, presenta­tions and spreadsheets. With My Lists you can create private or col­laborative to-do lists, while the appropriately named Share Files app enables sharing of up to one gigabyte of documents with your friends. Try 30 Boxes, an excellent date book application, or fbCal, which lets you tap into your exist­ing Outlook, iCal or Coogle Calen­dar. And don't forget that it's easy to remotely update your Facebook status by linking your account to your phone number (at facebook .com/mobile), then texting 32665.
200050_20090401_000056.xml
article
24
24
Article
Mantrack
Cinema Paradiso
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
We've seen a lot of so-called home-theater-in-a-box systems. This is the first to actually live up to the name. Epson's Ensemble HD ($5,000 and $7,000, epson.com) comes with an amp, a DVD player and a subwoofer, like the others, but the resemblance ends there. Instead of just adding speakers, Epson's package includes a 720p or 1080p pro­jector along with a motorized 100-inch drop-down screen. What's more, the screen housing also contains your right, left and center channel speakers, while the projector housing has right and left rear speakers. It's not just home theater; it's home cinema.
200050_20090401_000057.xml
advertisement
25
25
Display Ad
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Lorillard
Newport
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[no value]
200050_20090401_000058.xml
article
26
26,27
Article
Success
WORST CASE SCENARIO
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[no value]
[no value]
BOB PARSONS
I STARTED INTERNET SENSATION GO DADDY. BUT IT WOULD NEVER HAVE WORKED IF I HADN'T BEEN READY TO CRASH AND BURN
200050_20090401_000059.xml
advertisement
27
27
Display Ad
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Playboy
DIGITAL
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200050_20090401_000060.xml
advertisement
28
28
Display Ad
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ESCORT
PASSPORT
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200050_20090401_000061.xml
article
29
29,30
Article
Playboy Advisor
PLAYBOY ADVISOR
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
I'm a moron when it comes to reading women's signals, so I must turn to you. Here are some of the behaviors the woman I'm seeing has been exhibiting: She (a) says waiting for me on the day I'm flying in will make it the longest day of her life, (b) gets upset when she hears about women I've had sex with, (c) is so affectionate that we've spent the day in bed tightly wrapped up in each other because she didn't want to get up even to use the bathroom and (d) constantly wants to hold my hand or put her arm around my shoulders or waist, even when we're sitting on the sofa. Is there any expla­nation for all this other than her being in love with me?—P.K., Silver Spring, Maryland
200050_20090401_000062.xml
article
31
31,32,33,34,35,36,103,104
Playboy Interview
[no value]
Seth Rogen
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Eric Spitznagel
[no value]
200050_20090401_000063.xml
article
33
33
Article
[no value]
The Freaks and Geeks B-Team
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[no value]
[no value]
Rocky Rakovic
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200050_20090401_000064.xml
article
34
34,35
Review
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HEY, THIS BUD'S FOR YOU
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[no value]
[no value]
R.R.
<p>OUR PICKS FOR THE BEST STONER FILMS EVER</p>
200050_20090401_000065.xml
article
36
36
Article
[no value]
OTHER MEN WHO STOLE THE COVERS
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200050_20090401_000066.xml
advertisement
37
37
Display Ad
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PALMS
PLAYBOYCLUB
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[no value]
200050_20090401_000067.xml
article
39
39,38,40,99,100,101,102
Article
The Persecution Of Barry Bonds
THE PERSECUTION OF BARRY BONDS
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[no value]
JONATHAN LITTMAN
THIS MONTH, BASEBALL'S ALL-TIME GREATEST HOME-RUN HITTER IS SCHEDULED TO TAKE THE STAND ON STEROID-RELATED PERJURY CHARGES IN THE MOST SENSATIONAL COURT CASE TO ROCK PRO SPORTS IN YEARS. IF BARRY BONDS WERE WHITE, WOULD THERE EVEN BE A CASE? WHO'S THE REAL VILLAIN?
200050_20090401_000068.xml
article
41
41
Cartoon
Cartoon
[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000069.xml
article
42
42,43
Article
Pictorials
THE SWEDISH SUPERMODEL
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From our pages to...the big screen?
200050_20090401_000070.xml
article
44
44
Article
Features
COAD KILLERS
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[no value]
[no value]
JAMES R. PETERSEN
in this ^conomy iF"pays to shed those eHtra tuio wheels. r roundup of this year's stable of hot neui bihes *%
200050_20090401_000071.xml
article
44
44,45
Article
Sport/Stunt Bike
HAWASAHI NINJA ZX-6R
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[no value]
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The dream is speed, performance, slicing and dicing on track days and standing on the podium as a world-champion Supersport rider. Or the dream is being the star of a cable series devoted to stunts, pulling stoppies (jamming on the front brake to lift the rear wheel) from, oh, 160 mph. Call it Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde, but the ZX-6R is the weapon of choice for Super-sport racers and professional hooligans, er, stuntmen. (Google Kane Friesen or Jason Britton.) The reason? The ZX-6R is lighter (at 421.2 pounds), more powerful (130 hp at 13,500 rpm) and, with regard to handling, more precise and responsive than any of Kawasaki's Supersport predecessors. When Team Green sets out to revise a classic, to reclaim the crown in the hotly contested 600 cc category, it goes all out. Racers and renegades will gladly fork over $9,799 for this beauty, kawasaki.com
200050_20090401_000072.xml
article
45
45
Article
Money-Is-No-Object Bike
DUCATI DESMOSEDICI RR
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Imagine for a moment that the stock market recovers, your company puts all its profits into your 401(k), a rich uncle who hoarded Krugerrands names you in his will—what­ever it takes to make the phrase money is no object ring true. Your dream machine suddenly takes on the color red. Ducati's $72,500 Desmosedici RR is a replica of the Italian company's GP6, the bike factory-team riders used this past season to compete in MotoGP, the fastest, most competitive two-wheel races on earth. The Desmo's 989 cc V4 puts out almost 200 hp at 13,800 rpm, with an engine note so glorious it could turn the head of God. Or the highway patrol three states away. Of course, if money is no object, you probably have a track in your backyard. Zero to 60: 2.6 seconds. Top speed: 192 mph. Only 1,500 will be made, ducati.com
200050_20090401_000073.xml
article
46
46
Article
Sportster
HARLEY-DAVIDSON SPORTSTER XR1200
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[no value]
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We consider Harley's classic Sportster to be its own category of motorcycle. After teasing Americans with the new Sport­ster XR12OO prototype back in 2OO6, Harley introduced the dirt-track-racer replica as a European-market-only model. The few American motorcycle writers who tested it came back raving about its handling, power, braking and feel. The bike sought out corners with the kind of thirst not associ­ated with heavy, chrome-laden Harleys. Then Harley relented and started offering the bike to U.S. customers in December. The styling pays tribute to the dirt-track champions of three decades of AMA racing (starting
200050_20090401_000074.xml
article
46
46
Article
Econo-Wheels
VECTRIX VX-1
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[no value]
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We never thought playboy would feature a product whose tagline promises "Good. Clean. Fun." But here goes. For those of you whose dream is green, who seek emission-free mobility, energy independence and the smug satisfaction of know­ing you are morally superior to all but Al Gore, this machine defines future chic. The Vectrix harnesses the power of two nickel-metal hydride battery packs to zip along at speeds up to 62 mph (zero to 50 in 6.8 seconds). Depending on how you drive, it has a range of 35 to 55 miles—at a cost of about a penny a mile. The scooter recharges in three to five hours, from any electrical outlet (maybe Star­bucks will let you plug in while you sip your cappuccino and use the free wireless). This is a technical marvel, the first highway-legal all-electric two-wheel wonder on the planet. It's so silent it will scare you. Being the first kid on the block to own one does not come cheap: MSRP is $10,495. vectrix.com
200050_20090401_000075.xml
article
46
46
Article
Cruiser
YAMAHA V STAR 950
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[no value]
[no value]
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Cruisers have evolved from those beasts of the 1960s— think tractor engine slapped onto a weight bench—into elegant platforms for the creative use of chrome. The big-engined bruiser cruisers are still out there, but recently the industry (and customers) have looked to midsize engines. The point is to match cruiser feel and aesthetics with agility and ease of handling. You don't need the body-mass index of a linebacker to push Star's new V Star 950 around a parking lot. The 942 cc engine produces gobs of horsepower, 58.2 foot-pounds of torque at 3,500 rpm and, just as important in this category, a throaty exhaust note. Power flows through the beast; it is long (96 inches), lean (613 pounds) and low (with a 26.5-inch seat height). And it is delight­fully nimble. The sticker ranges from $7,890 to $8,090 depending on color, starmotorcycles.com
200050_20090401_000076.xml
article
47
47
Cartoon
Cartoon
[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000077.xml
article
49
49,48,50,51,52,53,92
Article
Pictorials
REMEMBERING BETTIE PAGE
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Neal Gabler
n/ erhaps the two most remarkable things about Bettie Page, the raven-haired sex siren who died last December at the age of 85, were, first, that people who didn't know her name could nevertheless instantly recognize her iconic image with the bangs and the expansive smile and the shapely leopard-skin-bikini-clad (or unclad) figure and. second, that so many people did know her name, enough that she was eulogized with long appreciations in The New York Times, The Washington Post and the Los Angeles Times among many other publications. For a time, in the 1950s. Bettie was the American equivalent of the models on French postcards—the girl who fired more secret adolescent fantasies than any other woman. But unlike those French models, who were nameless and faded into oblivion in part because sex was considered shameful. Bettie Page was
200050_20090401_000078.xml
article
54
54,55
Article
Features
THE PLAYBOY BAR: GIN
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[no value]
[no value]
Dorothy Parker
THE JUICE ON THE JUICE
200050_20090401_000079.xml
article
57
57,56,58,106,107,108,109,110,111
Article
Features
THE HILLIKER CURSE
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JAMES ELLROY
PART
200050_20090401_000080.xml
article
59
59
Cartoon
Cartoon
THE WAIT
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200050_20090401_000081.xml
article
60
60,61,62,63,64,65-66-67,68,69
Playmate of the Year
[no value]
Hope Dworaczyk, Miss April, 2009
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
<p>The sky's the limit for stunning Miss April</p>
200050_20090401_000082.xml
article
70
70
Article
Playboy's Party Jokes
PLAYBOY'S PARTY JOKES
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[no value]
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A boy wanted to go to the zoo and pestered his mother for days. Finally, she talked his reluctant father into taking the boy to see some animals.
200050_20090401_000083.xml
article
71
71
Cartoon
Cartoon
[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000084.xml
article
73
73,72,94,96,97,98
Fiction
[no value]
The Last Bachelor
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[no value]
[no value]
By JAY MCINERNEY
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200050_20090401_000085.xml
article
74
74,75,76,77
Article
Fashion
The Bernard Supremacy
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[no value]
[no value]
FASHION BY JENNIFER RYAN JONES
's carl0sm2nerd is a counterterrorism ;eRt whotICStass with class
200050_20090401_000086.xml
article
78
78,79,80,105
20Q
[no value]
Amy Smart
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Stephen Rebello
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200050_20090401_000087.xml
article
81
81
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Cartoon
[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000088.xml
article
82
82
Article
Features
LIARS, CHEATS & THIEVES
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[no value]
JAMIE MALANOWSKI
ANT WONDER ECONOMY NEEDS HELP, TAKE A LOOK AT SOME F THE HIGH-POWERED PUYERS WHO'VE SHOWN THEIR TRUE COLORS IN THE PAH YEAR
200050_20090401_000089.xml
article
82
82
Article
Features
ROBERT RUBIN
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Bill Clinton's Teflon Treasury secretary has taken hits for his contribution to the current cri­sis—in particular, for squelch­ing, in 1998, a proposal to regulate mortgage-backed rep has
200050_20090401_000090.xml
article
82
82
Article
Features\
AIG SCANDAL
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
an $85 billion government takeover kept insurance giant AIG from collapsing, company executives spent $440,000 on a five-day conference at California's St. Regis resort.
200050_20090401_000091.xml
article
82
82
Article
Features
SAM ISRAEL
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
DRIVING HIMSELF TO PRISON TO START A 20-YEAR SENTENCE, THE HEDGE-FUND OPERATOR WHO BILKED INVESTORS OUT OF $450 MILLION VANISHED, LEAVING ONLY HIS SUV ON A HUDSON RIVER BRIDGE, WITH "SUICIDE IS PAINLESS" WRITTEN ON THE HOOD. BUT ISRAEL WAS MORE SKIPPER THAN JUMPER, AND AFTER HIDING FOR THREE WEEKS AT A MASSACHUSETTS CAMPGROUND, HE DECIDED TO TURN HIMSELF IN.
200050_20090401_000092.xml
article
82
82
Article
Features
Ken Lewis
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[no value]
[no value]
In December Bank of America stockholders believed chairman Ken Lewis when he told them that if they approved September's fire-sale acquisition of a collapsing Merrill Lynch, "Bank of America will have the premier financial-services franchise." At the same time he was saying this, he was learning that Merrill was on its way to ji $15.3 billion loss—a fact he declined to disclose. See you in court. Ken.
200050_20090401_000093.xml
article
83
83
Article
Features
WALTER NOEL
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
THE NOELS OF GREENWICH HAD IT ALL. BUT HEDGE-FUND OPERATOR WALTER NOEL STEERED HIS CLIENTS TO BERNIE MADOFF. LAWSUITS ENSUED. SAYS A SPOKESMAN, "WE PLAN TO FULLY COOPERATE WITH ALL AUTHORITIES." THAT'S NEVER GOOD.
200050_20090401_000094.xml
article
83
83
Article
Features
Dick Fuld
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
always had a rigorous internal process." So said the chief executive of Lehman Brothers, nicknamed the Gorilla, in June 2008 in the face, of a staggering $2.8 billion quarterly loss. Well, it seemed stagger­ing then. Three months later, crippled by toxic mortgage debt, thq 158-year-old company collapsed completely. In congressional testi­mony the smug Fuld blamed Washington. The regulators knew what was happening—where was our bailout? Was it (air, a congressman wondered, to keep the $480 million you got from Lehman over the previous seven years while you steered it off a cliff? No, no, no, Fuld corrected. It was only, like, $300 million. Days later a disgruntled ex-employee sucker punched Fuld in the company gym. ]
200050_20090401_000095.xml
article
83
83
Article
Features
MARC DREIER
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Currently in federal lockup awaiting trial, Dreier was the perfec confidence man because everybody in his circle already had confi dence in him. A square-jawed graduate of Yale and Harvard Law
200050_20090401_000096.xml
article
83
83
Article
Features
CHRISTOPHER COX
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Meet the sleepy sheriff who let the rogues run wild. As chairman of the SEC, Cox helped remove limits on the amount of debt investment banks could carry. Months later none of the five investment banks in his domain remained. Cox's risk-management department could have warned him—if only he hadn't dismantled it.
200050_20090401_000097.xml
article
83
83
Article
Features
BERNIE MADOFF
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While we're busy blaming the mortgage brokers and investment ]
200050_20090401_000098.xml
article
84
84,85,86,87,88,89,90,91
Article
Pictorials
COMING TO AMERICA
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[no value]
[no value]
Conor Hogan
Our International Dream Team takes over the Mansion
200050_20090401_000099.xml
article
93
93
Cartoon
Cartoon
[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000100.xml
advertisement
95
95
Display Ad
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SINCLAIR Institute
VIDEOS!
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200050_20090401_000101.xml
article
96
96
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Cartoon
[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000102.xml
advertisement
97
97
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NORMAN MAILER
WRITERS COLONY
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200050_20090401_000103.xml
article
98
98
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Cartoon
Dirty Duck
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Bobby London
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200050_20090401_000104.xml
article
100
100
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[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000105.xml
advertisement
101
101
Display Ad
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Panties
Springtime Silk Nightie
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200050_20090401_000106.xml
advertisement
101
101
Display Ad
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SIGNEDROCK
ROCK
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200050_20090401_000107.xml
article
102
102
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Cartoon
[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000108.xml
advertisement
103
103
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Playboystore
Playboy
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200050_20090401_000109.xml
article
104
104
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[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000110.xml
advertisement
105
105
Display Ad
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Liberator
LIBERATOR
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200050_20090401_000111.xml
article
107
107
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[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000112.xml
article
108
108
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[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000113.xml
article
109
109
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MEATY Myths
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200050_20090401_000114.xml
article
110
110
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[cartoon]
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200050_20090401_000115.xml
article
111
111
Article
Get Next To The Girls Next door
GET NEXT TO THE GIRLS NEXT DOOR
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Here's an exclusive look at life inside the Playboy Mansion with the three women who know it best: Holly. Bridget and Kendra-Hugh Hefner's live-in girlfriends and stars of E's hit series THE GIRLS NEXT DOOR. This behind-the-scenes companion to the hit TV show offers an insider's peek at the extraordinary lives of Hef's three girlfriends.
200050_20090401_000116.xml
article
112
112
Article
News and Notes
SARA JEAN UNDERWOOD IS A BIG-SCREEN BEAUTY
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In Miss March, Eugene Bell (played by Zach Cregger, left) and Tucker Cleigh (Trevor Moore) take a road trip to the Playboy Mansion. Why? They are guys. What's the movie's actual setup? It's complicated. Anyway, Cleigh, a hapless lothario, meets PMOY 2007 Sara Jean Underwood and tries to woo her. What approach does he take? The old "I love your little dog" line. What happens? It's complicated. Go see the flick.
200050_20090401_000117.xml
article
112
112
Article
News and Notes
BODY BY PLAYMATE
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This is the 30-year-old face of Vitamins by Stacy. Yep, she looks as if she's 23 because she knows how to take care of herself—and now her secret is out. Miss February 1999 Stacy Fuson started taking vitamins regularly when she became a Playmate and has been looking for the perfect formula ever since. After talking to
200050_20090401_000118.xml
article
112
112
Article
News and Notes
FLASHBACH
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Before reality TV's rise you had to turn to Bay-watch to see beautiful women on the boob tube. Miss April 1999 Natalia Sokolova was one of a handful of Playmates who put on a bathing suit for the show. Born from good stock (and not just in looks—her mother is an award-winning sci­entist and her father an inventor), she went from modeling for Hawai­ian Tropic to living at the Mansion. Now she runs the events company Exquisite Planning and is wrapping up a movie called Business of Death.
200050_20090401_000119.xml
article
112
112,113
Article
News and Notes
DID YOU KNOW ?
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You can check out the Club at club.playboy.com and access the mobile-optimized site www.playboy.com from your phone.
200050_20090401_000120.xml
article
113
113
Article
Platmate News
When PMOY 1997
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how she keeps her stunning fig­ure, she replied,
200050_20090401_000121.xml
article
113
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Playmate News
DASHA IS ONE OF LES FEMMES IN NIKITA
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Plenty of girl groups trade on sexuality and lust but play coy about it when talking to the media. Miss |anuary 2009 Dasha Astafieva's NikitA is not that type of group. In an inter­view with AskMen .com Dasha (right) said NikitA is not as "sweet as the Spice Girls." Dasha also said she and her partner, Julia, dress like twins to exude an "aggressive sexual energy." They call NikitA's sound "pop-electro sexy-style." Since we don't speak Ukrainian, we can't attest to the sug-gestiveness of their lyr­ics, but their videos sure do make good on the idea of sexy-style.
200050_20090401_000122.xml
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Playmate News
MY FAVORITE PLAYMATE
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ROB HUEBEL
uMy favorite Playmate is Miss June 1954 M.irjjic Harrison. I think it's obvious why. She's all business, chatting it up on the Dhone, She's like. 'Oh, are we
200050_20090401_000123.xml
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Playmate News
OFF-BROADWAY BABY
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Miss November 1973 Monica Tidwell has produced her first off-Broadway play, Mindgame. Billed as a comic psycho-thriller, Mind-game starred Tony Award nomi­nee Keith Carradine (pictured) as the doctor at a deranged asylum. The production was staged at the SoHo Playhouse.
200050_20090401_000124.xml
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Playmate News
OUT AND ABOUT WITH...
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At the Victoria's Secret fashion show Brody Jen-ner couldn't keep his eyes or lips off PMOY 2008 Jayde Nicole. It looks like love. They met a couple of years ago at a Playboy Mansion party and have been insepara­ble of late. Jenner even recently had Jayde on his reality game show, Bromance. Jayde's job was to grill contestants imlnn tn hp Jpnnpr'g
200050_20090401_000125.xml
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PLAYBOYARCHIVE
PLAYBOY
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200050_20090401_000126.xml
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The Playboy Forum
OUR NEW PROHIBITION
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LAWRENCE LESSIG
RIDICULOUS COPYRIGHT LAWS HAVE :REATED AN ENTIRE GENERATION OF LAWBREAKERS
200050_20090401_000127.xml
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Article
Forum
WHY IT MATTERS
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Strictly speaking, it's illegal to download songs or smoke a blunt, are the sports leagues and other employers testing for recreational
200050_20090401_000128.xml
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Demonoid
Kazaa
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200050_20090401_000129.xml
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Letters to the Editor
Forum
READER RESPONSE
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SPECIAL EDITION
200050_20090401_000130.xml
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Article
Grapevine
Academy Members, Take Note
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this much HALLE BERRY she had BiUy Bob Thornton behind her and an Oscar in her future. Bodes well for the movie she's shooting here—unless it's Swordfish It
200050_20090401_000131.xml
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Grapevine
It Just Sounds Sexy
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io Determine your porn-star name, take your first pet's name and add the street you grew up on. Grapevine's would be Chauncey Glen, which is okay but not great. What's NIKKI COX's porn-star name? We don't know anything about her pet or street, but we're pretty sure it's just Nikki Cox.
200050_20090401_000132.xml
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Article
Grapevine
Rookie of the Year
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200050_20090401_000133.xml
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Article
Grapevine
Out and About
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Fact: It's not (always) ille­gal for a woman to bare her breasts in New York City. Taiwanese model C.C. WANG took full ad­vantage during Breast Cancer Awareness Month, with a shoot called Top­less in Manhattan. The middle photo was taken in front of the Crown Build­ing, home of Playboy's New York offices.
200050_20090401_000134.xml
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Article
Grapevine
Ceci N'est Pas un Pipe
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Who is EMMA DE CAUNES? In 1998 she won the Cesar (France's Oscar equivalent) for meilleur espoir feminin (most promising actress) for Un Frere. And she's still wowing 'em today. This Paris flash may win her the Cesar for meiUeur mamelon (best nipple). Pierre here thinks so.
200050_20090401_000135.xml
article
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Grapevine
It Ain't Harold Pinter, That's for Sure
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Mtiuinei awaru-winning foreigner! This is either Brit­ish novelist Doris Lessing, winner of the 2007 Nobel Prize in Litera­ture, or Brazil's MELANIE NUNES FRONCKOWIAK, whose posterior was deemed the best in the world at a recent pageant held by lingerie maker Sloggi. We always get those two confused.
200050_20090401_000136.xml
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Grapevine
In Fighting Shape
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Next time you watch a boxing match, look for the Boxing Giriz, 15 babes who act as mascots, ring girls and multiuse eye can­dy. They made their debut in December at Holyfield vs. Valuev, dressed in USA cheerleader outfits (for Holyfield) and Red Army uniforms (for Valuev). DONNA DUKE is their queen.
200050_20090401_000137.xml
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Article
Next Month
NEXT MONTH
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LISA RINNA-THIS BEAUTY HAS AN ILLUSTRIOUS TV CAREER. -JOW, AFTER GETTING IN SHAPE FOR DANCING WITH THE STARS UNO PUTTING OUT HER OWN WELLNESS BOOK AND WORKOUT DVDS, SHE'S READY TO SHOW HER ROCKIN' BOD.
200050_20090401_000138.xml
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C3
Display Ad
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DAVIDOFFCIGARETTESUSA
CIGARETTES
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200050_20090401_000139.xml
advertisement
C4
C4
Display Ad
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WOODFORD RESERVE
Whiskey
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200050_20090401_000140.xml
other
C4
C4
Back Cover
Back Cover
Back Cover
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BOURBON
200050_20090401_000141.xml