Issue: 20090301

Sunday, March 1, 2009
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Saturday, July 26, 2014
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Articles
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ENTERTAINMENT FOR /V
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PLAYBILL
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March Madness: In 2009 the term seems apt for more than a giant hoops tournament. Is it just us. or is this whole country in a sanity recession? At this issue's heart lies a story of classic American madness, that of Ted Kaczynski, the Unabomber, as told by his brother, David Kaczynski. My Brother Ted isn't a plea for anything, merely a recollection by a sibling who still can't understand what happened to his "self once removed." We'll also note here that David condemns capital punishment, as we have always done in our Forum pages, and serves as executive director of New Yorkers Against the Death Penalty (nyadp .org). Author Jim Harrison visits mad­ness in The World's Fastest White Woman, a dream about a beautiful track star who runs to stay sane. But we're not all imagi­nary Olympians; if the thump-thump-thump of feet on street doesn't do the trick, look to
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CONTENTS
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WOODFORD RESERVE
Whiskey
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THICKER FULLER HAIR
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
What Obama Should Do
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A lot of what former Democratic senator and onetime presidential can­didate Gary Hart suggests in his Agenda fora New Era (December) would greatly increase government spending, even as he preaches about the need to cut waste. For example, Hart suggests ordering hybrids to replace all the vehi­cles in the White House fleet. While this would be a fine gesture toward a greener future, it would also cost mil­lions of dollars. Same with replacing coal-burning power plants with renew­able sources. We should do this over time, but renewable sources are much less efficient and deliver less power, meaning we would have to build many new plants. Finally, Hart suggests the military no longer needs carrier-based or amphibious strike groups because modern warfare is confined to small-unit engagements and special opera­tions. That may be true, but with China
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
WIGGLE ROOM
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As I got my hair cut recently, my seven-year-old son sat waiting on a bench in the barbershop, engrossed in a magazine. Turns out, of course, it was a copy of I'I-avboy. A barber kindly put il away, and everyone had a good laugh. On our walk home, my son, sensing his leading material had been inappropri­ate, apologetically told me, "Dad, I just want you to know...l wasn't reading any of the articles."
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
HOLIDAY HITS
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How can you compile a list of clas­sic holiday party songs ("Deejay Your Christmas Party for $29.70," After Hours, December) without including the all-time greatest: Cheech & Chong's "Santa Claus and His Old Lady"?
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
ALL-NATURAL ALT
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What a treat to see an older woman— 48-year-old supermodel Carol Alt—on the cover and inside your December issue (Carol Alt in the Raw). I've been married lor more than 25 years and have thoroughly enjoyed watching my wife grow from a beautiful woman of 21 to an amazingly beautiful woman of 49. My wile says she stays in shape for herself, not for me, and I find that confidence very sexy. As Alt notes, eating healthy is a big part of looking healthy. I have seen this firsthand, as my wife also believes in eating raw foods. Couple that with an active lifestyle, and you have paradise. I am a lucky man.
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Dear Playboy
MORE ADVICE FOR THE PRESIDENT
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Regarding Gary Hart's agenda for the new president: The chief executive should make hybrids the standard for the entire federal car pool, not just the White House. He should also use the power of revenue sharing to encourage (i.e., force) local, county and state authorities to do the same. If that happened, we wouldn't have the Chicago Police Department converting its patrol fleet to gas-guzzling Chevy Tahoes.
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
WHISKEY VERSUS WHISKY
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In The Playboy Bar: Scotch (December) you refer to Scotch "whiskey." But only Irish whiskey is spelled with an e. A subtle note: You name three whisky-producing regions in Scotland, but traditionally there are four: Lowland, Campbelltown, Islay and Highland, which includes the islands and Speyside. In fact, the Spey-side region features as many distilleries as the rest of the country. Some people count the islands as a sixth region.
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Letters to the Editor
Dear Playboy
SCENE-STEALER
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You give credit in Sex in Cinema 2008 (December) to Kristen Bell and Russell Brand for their naughty performances in
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Dear Playboy
MUSIC NOTES
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Up until now I've never had a prob­lem with any of your magazine's con­tent, but a category is missing from the Playboy's Music Poll 2008 ballot (Decem-
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Dear Playboy
LOVING OPRAH
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Thanks for spreading holiday cheer in the form of Denis Leary and his funny, insightful appreciation of Oprah Winfrey (Grande Venti Mocha Oprah Chai, Decem­ber). I laughed. I cried. I Googled Oprah. I also paid a visit to my local watering hole, where I noticed a sign behind the bar: is Oprah we trist; ail others pay cash. That about says it all.
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Dear Playboy
CREDIT IS DUE
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In the Playboy Intewinc with Hugh Jack-man (December) the actor recounts diving on top of a piano and sliding onto the floor during an early Broadway performance of The Boy From Oz. Jackman ad-libbed his recovery by calling to a stagehand he remembered as "Jason" and having him slide across the piano to test its slickness. That stagehand was me! I was so close to seeing my name in my favorite magazine. Is there anything you can do? Justin Sanok Toms River, New Jersey
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News And Notes
THE WORLD OF PLAYBOY
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HEF SIGHTINGS, MANSION FROLICS AND NIGHTLIFE NOTES
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PALMS
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Playboy After Hours
Maria Brink
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Catch singer Maria Brink in the bathtub and you may not recog­nize her. Onstage, the gorgeous, tattooed and voluptuous front-woman wails, screams and sweats along with her metal band, In This Moment. But far from the moshing crowds, she gives the rock-chick persona a rest. "I love long baths," she purrs. "I light candles and sing Sarah McLachlan." Serenity is rare for a woman who spends up to 300 days of the year on the road, opening for such monsters of rock as Rob Zombie and Ozzy Osbourne, but she tries. "My dudes are gentlemen," she says of her bandmates. "They give me the back of the bus. I hang curtains and have candles and flowers and all my dresses. It's my little se­cret girlie place." Maria doesn't avoid the party scene that rages up front, but she does have one rule: "I don't let them have girls under 21 on the bus," she says. "But if she's a grown woman who knows what she's doing and wants to get crazy and naked with them, I don't care." The girl can hang; just watch out that she doesn't beat you at your own game. In Las Vegas to record its latest album, The Dream, the band staged a Texas hold 'em tournament. Guess who won. "I'm a competitive woman, and I learn fast," Maria brags. She plans to blow the cash on more of the trademark baby-doll dresses that barely contain her curves as she bounds around the stage. "I like my doll dresses really short. I like feminine but ec­centric stuff. I'm having a dress made out of this crazy gold 1980s material I just bought." So do the frocks figure in bedroom role-playing? "No way!" she says, giggling. "You'd get much more special treatment than that."
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After Hours
Welcome to the Arty Party
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When first we heard of Dr. Sketchy's Anti-Art School we pegged it as some­thing that would never play in Peoria. Artistic young people gathering in a bar to drink cocktails and draw live burlesque models? We applauded (in a quiet man­ner) the fusion of so many favorite con­cepts—appreciation of the female form, artistic impulse, mixology—but lamented (also quietly) that it would never get out of Williamsburg, Brooklyn. Turns out we were wrong—incredibly so. With upwards of 40 chapters in the U.S. and another 20 overseas, the Dr. Sketchy's phenomenon is swimming in the mainest of hipster mainstreams. In home base New York, that means better babes and
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After Hours
Jamie Holly
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PLAYBOY: So what's your job title? JAMIE: I'm an off-bearer. PLAYBOY: Does that mean you take your shirt off and bare your— JAMIE: I work at a plywood mill. An off-bearer pulls wood. PLAYBOY: Aha. You pull wood. The guys in the mill must appreciate that. JAMIE: I hear that one every day! I pull wood out, grade it and sort it. PLAYBOY: This interview is writing it­self. Do you sort the wood you pull by girth or by length? Rigidity? JAMIE: If there's a defect in a board, I plug in the holes. PLAYBOY: Oh. You really are talking about plywood. Are there many women at your mill? JAMIE: Some, but I'm the only one not at a desk job. I didn't start as an off-bearer, but I asked for a more demanding job. It's such a good workout that I don't even go to the gym. I think I have more stamina than the guys.
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After Hours
Read Her Body Language
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The Geeks' Guide to World
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After Hours
Where to See Zach Galifianakis in 2009
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With five films and a TV pilot in the hopper for 2009, comic Zach
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After Hours
A Playboy Editor Reports on the Beautiful Game
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When Research Editor Bryan Abrams told us he was going to Nepal to play in the Elephant Polo World Championships, we figured it was a eu­phemism. For what—Asian sex tour for chubby chasers, all-day acid trip in Central Park—we didn't care to know. Turns out he was actually going to Nepal to play in the Elephant Polo World Championships. His team, the New York Blue, all but one member of which had never mounted a
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After Hours
March Badness
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Worst month of the year? March. February is short and April cruel, but March seems just plain bad. Winter won't end, you've bulked up like a bear readying for hibernation, and three of your Final Four picks tanked early—again. What can you do to make it through? Some suggestions: Drink Guinness, and not just on March 17. Why do you need St. Patrick's Day as an excuse to consume this pleasant beverage? This year marks Guinness's 250th birthday; every day can be Guinness day. Eat ramen. Not the little sodium bombs that come in Styrofoam cups. We're talking the good stuff. Flavor & the Menu magazine identifies the proliferation of authentic Japanese ramen and soba chains as its top trend in import cuisine. On a cold day it's hard to beat noo­dles in a bowl as big as your head. Buy that muscle car you've always wanted. No­body needs a new car from a dying company, yet you still have a soft spot for De­troit. Why buy a 2009 Dodge Neon when you could have a 1969 Dodge Charger—the car known to many of us as the General Lee? Lounge in long Johns. No one can question your grit in a true union suit (a red one-piece with ass flap, $30 at jcpenney.com), and you'll find yourself overus­ing the words dagnabbit and varmint, which your wife or girlfriend will just love. Pray for sun on March 8. That's GoTopless Day, on which women will (okay, may) take to the streets to fight for equality of bare-chestedness. That's right—public boobies.
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After Hours
Watchmen
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Stephen Rebello
Zack Snyder, the director of 300. seems like the perfect guy to helm the movie ver­sion of Watchmen, the visionary apocalyp­tic graphic novel by writer Alan Moore, illustrator Dave Gibbons and colorist John Higgins. "When you read the comic, every­thing you know about pop culture, religion and your own icons gets turned around," says Snyder. "It's sexy, it's violent, it's bloody, but moviegoers are hungry for something really different."
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After Hours
Now Showing
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rigmci: me Legend of Chun-Li; Michael Cera is a Youth in Revolt; Milla Jovovich doesn't get A Perfect Getaway. Read more at playboy.com/entertainmenL
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After Hours
BIG BOX OFFICE
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Sandra Bullock's movies to date have grossed a not-too-shabby $1,200,204,785 domestically. Speed was her biggest hit, taking in more than $121 million, while Who Shot Patakango? earned only $2,343. Bullock's latest flick. All About Steve, is her first romantic comedy since 2002's Two Weeks Notice.
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After Hours
The Girls Next Door: Season 4
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Stacie Hougland
chstabbing con­testants, but Holly, Brid­get and Kendra always had a rollicking good time at the Mansion. Highlights In­clude a visit to Holly's home state of Alaska and the Midsummer Night's Dream Party. Best extra: Commentary by the girls. ¥¥¥¥ —StacleHougland
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After Hours
Religulous
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Bryan Reesman
els the globe to challenge religious zealots and po­seurs (he writes about hi* adventures in our July 2008 issue). This scathing docu­mentary scores major points by calling falsa prophets and fringe weirdos on their delusions. Best ex­tra: BiU Maher Monologue* From Around the World. WW -SryonReesmon
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After Hours
Zack and Miri Make a Porno
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BUZZ McClain
e shockingly vulgar, h larious first half sets up the premise—platonic deadbeats Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks decide to make an amateur X-rated sci-fi film to pay the Mils— only to climax too quickly with a well-intentioned but flaccid romance. Best ex­tra: Making-of featurette. (BD) V V '/> -Buzz McCtaln
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After Hours
TEASE FRAME
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For her tasty big-screen debut, in Varsity Blues (pictured), Ali Larter sprayed on a whipped-cream bikini in an attempt to seduce quarterback James Van Der Beek. She now makes an impression as one of the ordinary people with ex­traordinary powers on NBC's Heroes. See Larter next as a screwy temp who stalks co-worker Idris Elba in Obsessed.
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After Hours
The Godfather II
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Chris Hudak
Most movie sequels suck, and most movie games suck. But the game based on the best sequel ever made does not suck at all. This action-strategy hybrid for 360. PC and PS3 builds the player's unique mobster saga from the best lines and most iconic moments in the film. While you won't find flashbacks to Sicily (or any De Niro), you will see a compelling blend of shooting, brawling and strategic planning as you vie with other families to wipe out their dons and take control of the various rackets (drugs, prostitution, gambling and so on) in New York, Miami and Havana. Owning all of one racket confers bonuses you can leverage to try to take over others. And it's all interspersed with gritty cinematic clips and heaps of Corleone-style terrorism. VVV'/j -Chris Hudak
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After Hours
STREET FIGHTER IV
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Scott Alexander
(360, PC, PS3)
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After Hours
ONECHANBARA
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S.A.
(360, Wii) What's
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After Hours
A Real Cutup
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Based on the anime TV series, Afro Samurai (360, PS3), out this month, lets you put on a hack-and-slash clinic at the intersection of hip-hop, ninjas and Samuel L. Jackson. We always had a feeling this would be a better game than a cartoon.
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10 Bands to Watch
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The Bloody Beetroots This duo is from Italy but has nothing to do with Italo-disco revi­sionism. Instead, it's the electro outfit most likely to become the new Justice, putting the punk back in the Daft Punk formula.
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After Hours
Snake & Jake's
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From a review of a down-and-dirty New Orleans haunt on our list of 10 dives worth discovering: "Not even the wrath of Hurricane Katrina could kill the gonzo soul of Snake & Jake's Christmas Club Lounge. This rattrap in the Crescent City's Uptown section has built an irresistibly grungy reputation as the spot to crash-land after you're already wasted out of your mind. No matter what the clock says, it's always three a.m. Even happy hour doesn't start until 10 p.m. The interior is solar-eclipse dark, illuminated mostly by the string of glowing red Christmas lights that gives the bar its name. Regulars liken the deca­dent atmosphere to Weimar-era Berlin or a speak­easy during Prohibition, and the bartenders are admired for their skills at amateur pyrotechnics." For the full list, visit playboy.com/divebars.
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After Hours
Picture-Perfect?
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Paige (below) is some lucky guy's girl, but is she perfect? Find out on Search for the Perfect Girlfriend. After interviews and a nude photo shoot, you'll know. Beginning February 27, Search for the Per­fect Girlfriend airs Fridays at nine p.m. East­ern and Pacific time on Playboy TV.
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After Hours
Hef on Film
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At the climax of Miss March, a film by Zach Cregger and Trevor Moore of the comedy troupe the Whitest Kids U'Know, the two main characters try to sort out their romantic lives at a party at the Playboy Mansion. One of them stumbles into a room and finds his lifelong idol, Hugh M. Hefner, played by the Man himself. Hef tries his best to console young Tucker with a tender memory.
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Playboy's City Guide
Where to Party in the Motor City
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What'U you do in Detroit over the Final Four weekend? Start here.... Happy hour: The Town Pump (thetown pumptavern.com). Sports bar: Cheli's Chili Bar, owned by hockey legend Chris Chelios. You need a shirt, but teeth are optional (chelischilibar.com). Steak house (and hotel): Next Iron Chef winner Michael Symon's Roast anchors the new Westin Book Cadillac hotel (roastdetroit.com, bookcadillacwestin.com). Expense-account dinner: Rat­tlesnake Club (rattlesnakeclub.com). Dive bar: You won't find a better dive bar in any city than Gusoline Alley (gus olinealley.com). Hangover cure: The Bomber Restaurant, in nearby Ypsilanti, offers a signature breakfast—four eggs, a pound of potatoes and a pound of meat. They should in­clude a gurney to wheel you out (bomberrestaurant.net).
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Playboy's City Guide
PLAYBOY CITY GUIDES!
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This month we bring you to Detroit for the NCAA Final Four, giving you plenty of time to buy your plane and game tix. Given the Detroit Lions' 0-16 record and the auto compa­nies' problems, this city could use some love. Here's how to spread yours. For our com­plete City Guides package, go to playboy.com/cityguides.
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Playboy's City Guide
Girls, Girls
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We learned two things from our Super Saturday Night Party that preceded the Super Bowl in Detroit three years ago: The local ladies love to party, and they are lovely indeed. Here are a few suggestions on where to meet and greet come Final Four weekend. Downtown drinks: Pulse Lounge (pulsedetroit.com) stays open until two a.m.— sophisticated, unpreten­tious and definitely happen­ing. Live music: Magic Stick has one stage, one bar, 10 billiard tables and the hot­test roster of touring bands to come through Detroit (majesticdetroit.com). Pick-
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Playboy's City Guide
Off the Hook
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As public monuments go, none is more badass than Joe Louis's fist, a 24-foot-long bronze like­ness honoring Detroit's own Brown Bomber, who held the heavyweight title for nearly 12 years, starting in 1937. Since the fist was unveiled down­town, in 1987, it has been a source of controversy. Is it a statement of black power? A call to vio­lence? For our money, it says one thing: Nobody hit harder than Joe Louis. This monument beats Philly's Rocky statue by first-round KO.
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Playboy's City Guide
Border Patrol
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Don't forget to bring your passport to Final Four week­end. A short drive from De­troit is the southernmost Canadian city: Windsor, On­tario. Cuban cigars and sports betting are legal, and various members of the "Windsor ballet" dance completely nude at raucous clubs such as Cheetah's (pictured above). Even escort services are fair game, for your "friend." Most cabs will take you over the border and back if you have the paperwork. Start out at Caesars (caesarswindsor .com). The bars are lively, the food is solid, and there's plenty of action at the tables.
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WHAT THEY'RE THINKING
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ACCORDING TO
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THE PLAYBOY POLL
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WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF THE WOMAN YOU ARE WITH MADE MORE MONEY THAN YOU?
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TWO THOUSAND TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS
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ACCORDING TO NIELSEN, THE TYPICAL AMERICAN HOME CONTAINS $2,200 WORTH OF UNUSED BUT VALUABLE GOODS THE FAMILY COULD SELL TO RAISE CASH.
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NUDE
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By gender and age grouping, the percentage of people who have electronically sent or posted online nude or seminude photos of themselves. TEENAGE BOYS:
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ODD STAT OF THE MONTH
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ACCORDING TO BBC NEW
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TWENTY-FOUR
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Impotence is legal grounds for divorce in 24 states.
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18%
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THIS PAST OCTOBER, WHILE
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$225
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THE WINNING BID FOR THE TURKEY SEEN
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Bloodisbeautiful
Games
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200050_20090301_000056.xml
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20
20
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The Playboy Mansion
Kandyland
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200050_20090301_000057.xml
article
21
21
Article
Mantrack
First Person: Free Your Skis
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Bob Sloezen
Want to really experience Aspen? Start by skipping the lifts
200050_20090301_000058.xml
article
21
21
Article
Mantrack
Blood in the Crisper
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Ninjas are a constant threat. They strike hard, they strike fast, they put a dent in your Chunky Mon­key. Keep black-clad as­sassins out of your icebox once and for all with these decoy shuriken fridge-magnet throwing stars ($19 for two. epauletshop .com). They should dis­tract those ninjas until you can swoop in with your katana.
200050_20090301_000059.xml
article
21
21
Article
Mantrack
Confusion Cubed
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Our biggest limitations often come from our own assumptions. For centuries
200050_20090301_000060.xml
article
22
22
Article
Mantrack
About Time
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We're used to seeing watches made of steel. We see wood less often. And we don't usually see fish in the mix at all. Nevertheless, Breil Milano's watchmakers have constructed their elegant new Mediterraneo Chrono ($895, breilmilano.com) using a polished stainless-steel case, sapelli wood inserts and a strap made from the skin of a dogfish (a type of small shark). Of course, we're not used to seeing quality Italian watches that cost less than a grand, either, especially ones with an inlaid outline of the Med­iterranean coast centered on the face. Not that we're complaining. Plus, since it's water-resistant down to TOO meters, you could even take this watch for a dip in its namesake body of water. We don't recommend showing off the band to any sharks you may encounter.
200050_20090301_000061.xml
article
22
22
Article
Mantrack
Pack It In
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If you can bring only one bag to the Amazon rain forest, make it this one. Trop­ical downpours are no match for the water-resistant exterior, heat-welded seams and watertight zippers of Tumi's sleek T-Tech Hydro sports backpack ($225, tumi.com). It's also good if you're taking the A train.
200050_20090301_000062.xml
article
22
22
Article
Mantrack
Hack Your Life: Get Your Music Anywhere
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The idea of physically lugging your music files (or any files, really) around with you is becoming increasingly outdated. Espe­cially when it's possible to access your en­tire music collection worldwide with an Internet connection. If you use iTunes, the free Simplify Media plug-in (simplify media.com) lets you use the Net to stream music from your home computer to any iTunes-capable device (Winamp and Rhythmbox players are also compatible).
200050_20090301_000063.xml
article
22
22
Article
Mantrack
Navigator? I Hardly Know Her
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Most GPS gadgets don't show elevation, which is fine if you're cross­ing rural Kansas. In. say. San Francisco, it's a different story. After playing with Navigon's new 8100T ($600, navigon.com) we were sur­prised bywhat a difference ditching the usual flat view makes. Seeing the elevation of the hills and valleys around you definitely helps orient your intuitive sense of direction. And the 8100T is packed with bells and whistles such as a 4.8-inch touch screen, voice recognition, free real-time traffic info and Lane Assistant Pro (which gives lane-by-lane guidance). Size may not matter, but elevation definitely does.
200050_20090301_000064.xml
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23
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Newport
Cigarettes
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200050_20090301_000065.xml
article
24
24
Playboy Interview
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Dan Vanden Berge
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200050_20090301_000066.xml
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25
25
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John Jameson Import Company
WHISKEY
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200050_20090301_000067.xml
article
26
26,112
Article
Success
SUCCESS
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DUFF MCKAGAN
•••OUST A LITTLE •**
200050_20090301_000068.xml
article
27
27,111
Article
Playboy Advisor
PLAYBOY ADVISOR
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Is there a correlation between how ticklish a woman is and how easily she gets oft? In my limited expe­rience, ticklish women seem to be more sexually responsive.—RS., Keno/a Lake, New York
200050_20090301_000069.xml
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Schwarzkopf & Henkel
HairCare
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200050_20090301_000070.xml
article
29
29,30,31,32,33,34,101,102
Playboy Interview
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Kenny Chesney
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Rob Tannenbaum
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200050_20090301_000071.xml
article
31
31
Article
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Kenny Chesney: By the Numbers
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200050_20090301_000072.xml
article
32
32,33
Article
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WHEN NASHVILLE GOES HOLLYWOOD
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Steve Pond
<p>WHAT HAPPENS WHEN COUNTRY STARS HOOK UP WITH MOVIE ROYALTY? IT'S A MIXEP) RAG</p>
200050_20090301_000073.xml
article
34
34
Article
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THE ESSENTIAL KENNY CHESNEY
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S.P.
<p>CLASSIC KENNY: When the Sun Goes Down, 2004. Fun in the sun, laid-back tempos, nostalgic ballads, nods to slick 1970s popsters like Billy Joel and James Taylor...and first-week sales on the high side of half a million. What more do you want?</p>
200050_20090301_000074.xml
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Astroglide
Astroglide
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200050_20090301_000075.xml
article
36
36,37,38,98,100,101
Article
My Brother Ted
MY BROTHER TED
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[no value]
DAVID KACZYNSKI
LONG BEFORE TED KACZYNSKI BECAME THE UNABOMBER — ONE OF THE COUNTRY'S MOST DANGEROUS MADMEN —
200050_20090301_000076.xml
article
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39
Cartoon
Cartoon
[cartoon]
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200050_20090301_000077.xml
article
40
40,41,42,43,44,45
Article
Pictorials
Playboy's Sexiest Celebrities
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merica has been fascinated by celebrities since the' golden age of the silver screen. Movie stars like Greta Garbo and Jean Harlow became our form of royalty in the 1930s. A celebrity sighting, whether in a magazine or—whoa! —on some city street, inspired awe and wonderment. Celebrities were mysterious and untouchable. They seemed covered in pixie dust. What you didn't know about them was as interesting as what you did know. In recent years, however, the notion of celebrity has changed. Today we are celebrity saturated. There are celebri­ties for celebrity's sake, who can't sing or act. You can't open your eyes without seeing stars on billboards, on the Internet and on Larry King. Their personal lives make prime-time news. Their sex tapes on the web are as quotidian as Dow Jones charts. But one thing hasn't changed: They remain the ava­tars of hotness, sex icons of their age. They command power, money and our attention because they are our fantasies in the flesh. All that said, enough with the cultural criticism. We've picked our favorite celebs for 2009. Kick back and enjoy.
200050_20090301_000078.xml
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46,47,48,102,104,105,106,107,108,109,110
Article
Features
BOOM
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GEORGE PROCHNIK
to*
200050_20090301_000079.xml
article
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49
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[cartoon]
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<? v i
200050_20090301_000080.xml
article
50
50,51
Article
Features
MUSIC AWARDS
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HANG ON TO YOUR HEAD­PHONES. HERE'S WHAT ROCKED OUR NA/ORLD—AND YOURS
200050_20090301_000081.xml
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52
Article
Features
YOUNG JEEZY
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The Atlanta MC's third album-and second straight to debut at number one-turned out to be a news broadcast from the future.
200050_20090301_000082.xml
article
52
52
Article
Features
5 PLAYBOY'S SEXIEST MUSIC VIDEOS OF 2008
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1 BRITNEY SPEARS
200050_20090301_000083.xml
article
53
53,54
Article
Playboy's Rock the Rabit gallery
ROCK the RABBIT gallery
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EVERY YEAR, SOME OF OUR FAVORITE ARTISTS DESiQ&lHEIR OWN PLAYBOY T-SHIRT^
200050_20090301_000084.xml
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55,56
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JACK DANIEL'S
Whiskey
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200050_20090301_000085.xml
article
57
57
Article
Jam-Band Roundtable
JAM-BAND ROUND TABLE
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S MONTH 1EGENDARY JAM ACT PHISH REUNIT^BR ASE^M^AVffS IN MPTON, VIRGINIA. TREY ANASTASIOS CREW HASNT rtJuREDTolrnORiTHAN FOUR YEARS. THE SHOWS HAVE IGNITED A NATIONWIDE BUZZ, WITH THE CONCERTS SELLING OUT IN FIVE MINUTES-THE LATEST PROOF OF THE ENDURING LOVE FOR IMPROVISATIONS MUSIC. WE DISCUSSED THE PHENOMENON WITH OLD-GUARD MEMBERS OF THE SCENE BOB WEIR OF THE GRATEFUL DEAD AND GREGG ALLMAN OF THE ALLMAN BROTHERS. ALONG WITH MEMBERS OF NEWER BANDS-CHUCK GARVEY OF MOE AND BRENDAN BAYLISS OF UMPHREY'S MCGEE-THAT KEPT THE JAM-BAND BANNER ALOFT DURING PHISHS LONG ABSENCE FROM THE ROAD. _________
200050_20090301_000086.xml
article
58
58,59
Article
Music Poll Winners
JAZZ ARTIST OF THE YEAR
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Even though 2009's Jazz Artist of the Year is celebrated as one of the form's premier alto sax players, Greg Osby has never rested on his lau­rels. He's always searching for something differ­ent and new. From fronting his stripped-down downtown trio and playing with the M-Base Collective back in the mid-1980s to jamming onstage with the Dead, Osby is a ceaseless in­novator. Now, at the age of 48, he is no lon­ger the young lion he was during all those late nights at Bradley's. But that's okay: "As a young musician," he says, "I wanted to be the most respected or feared gunslinger in the saloon. In time I learned to shut up, slow down, listen and accept that I didn't know everything."
200050_20090301_000087.xml
article
59
59
Article
Music Poll Winners
HALL OF FAME
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Given how many write-in votes Rush got from readers for best live act of the year, it's clear the innovative Toronto band's star has never burned brighter than right now. The definitive version of the trio was solidified in 1974, and from then on bassist Geddy Lee, guitarist Alex Lifeson and drummer Neil Peart have followed a relentlessly experimental path while maintaining one consis­tent quality: mind-bending virtuosity. Together they've created arena-ready hard rock such as "Fly by Night" established the blueprint for prog rock with the song suites and fantasy-literature im­agery of LPs such as 2112 and Hemispheres, and successfully guided their legion of fans into synth territory with albums like Power Windows. Along the way, they've also written some of the most en­during and best-loved tunes of classic-rock radio, including "Tom Sawyer," "Closer to the Heart" and "Freewill." Unlike so many acts whose work populates classic-rock radio, however, Rush still matters. The band's most recent album. Snakes & Arrows, was the second-highest-charting LP of its career, and the resultant tour has run for two years now, drawing arena-size audiences in 2008 to the tune of $18 million. Further proof of Rush's staying power—both as musicians and as a con­cert draw—can be heard and seen on the 27-track Snakes & Arrows [Live) double album and DVD, both released this year. Though Rush's dozens of gold and platinum albums and performances before as many as 60,000 fans apparently don't warrant its inclusion in Cleveland's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, we're proud to welcome the band, on _behalfjof our millions of readers, to ours..
200050_20090301_000088.xml
article
60
60,61,62
Article
Features
AT YOUR DESK, IN YOUR LAP AND ON THE TOWN
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[no value]
SCOTT ALEXANDER
HOW MOBILE DO YOU WANT TO BE? THERE'S A DIGITAL MAJORDOMO TO SUIT YOU WHEREVER YOU PLAN TO GO
200050_20090301_000089.xml
article
63
63
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Cartoon
[cartoon]
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200050_20090301_000090.xml
article
64
64,65,66,67,68,69-70-71,72,73
Playmate
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Jennifer Pershing, Miss March, 2009
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<p>Miss March</p>
200050_20090301_000091.xml
article
74
74
Article
Playboy's Party Jokes
PLAYBOY'S PARTY JOKES
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A girl asked her boyfriend, "What do you want for your birthday?"
200050_20090301_000092.xml
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75
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Cartoon
[cartoon]
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200050_20090301_000093.xml
article
77
77,76
Article
Fiction
THE WORLD'S FASTEST WHITE WOMAN
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JIM HARRISON
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200050_20090301_000094.xml
article
78
78,79,80,113
20Q
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Flight of the Conchords
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Eric Spitznagel
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200050_20090301_000095.xml
article
81
81
Cartoon
Cartoon
THE PORTRAIT
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200050_20090301_000096.xml
article
82
82,83,84,85,86,87
Article
Fashion
ROCK THE RABBIT
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Joseph de acetis
This ygung British band Is fitting its style to Its suc­cess. "When we started, we used to wear clothes
200050_20090301_000097.xml
article
89
89,88
Article
Features
SHARK TALE
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[no value]
[no value]
THAYER WALKER
1 don't have the best luck with animals. I've been on a million safaris, and I've never seen a goddamn leopard. My closest and least enjoyable experience with very large creatures came in Nepal when a rhinoceros chased me up a tree. Sometimes I think I'm better off going to the zoo. So when I had the chance to join the tour company Shark Diver on a six-day trip to Mexico's Isla Guadalupe to cage dive with great white sharks, I approached it with measured excitement. One hundred and eighty miles southwest of Ensenada in Baja California, Guadalupe is the best place in the northern hemisphere to see the world's most ferocious predators. Between August and December they show up in droves—more than 100, scientists say—to feed on a blub-bery medley of seals and sea lions. Because divers here are almost guaranteed a chance to swim in proximity to them, Guadalupe has become a haunt of dive boats in recent years. It's also the latest political battleground on which the fight for the future of this threatened fish is being waged. After a bumpy 20-hour crossing on the 87-foot Islander, we
200050_20090301_000098.xml
pictorial
90
90,91,92,93,94,95,96,97
Pictorial
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Backstage with Aubrey O'Day
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Brantley Bardin
<p>THE DANITY KANE STAR TAKES HER ACT SOLO</p>
200050_20090301_000099.xml
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99
99
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[cartoon]
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100
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200050_20090301_000103.xml
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BetterSex
VIDEOS
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200050_20090301_000104.xml
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104
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MEATY Myths
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200050_20090301_000105.xml
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105
105
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Playboy
DIGITAL EDITION
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200050_20090301_000106.xml
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105
105
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Playboy Store
PAUL RUDITIS
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200050_20090301_000107.xml
article
106
106
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Dirty Duck
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Bobby London
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200050_20090301_000108.xml
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107
107
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PLAYBOYARCHIVE
PLAYBOY
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BOWFLEX
Weights
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200050_20090301_000111.xml
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Liberator
LIBERATOR
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200050_20090301_000112.xml
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109
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Panties
Open Heart 2-piece set
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200050_20090301_000113.xml
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WARD SULTON
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Article
News and Notes
LAS VEGAS STRIP
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Dancing With the Shirs winner Miss April 1997 Kelly Monaco fuses her dance moves with her lack of inhibition in Peepshow, Sin Ciry's sexiest burlesque act. Kelly stars as the precocious Bo Peep, who discovers her sexuality throughout the show. Also strutting her stuff for Tony Award-winning director Jerry Mitchell is the Spice Girls' Mel B. Peepshow opens this month at Planet Hollywood.
200050_20090301_000117.xml
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114
114
Article
News and Notes
PROFESSORS ANALYZE OUR FIGURES
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Mercyhurst College professors Terry Pet­ti John and Brian Jungeberg published the paper "Playboy Playmate Curves: Changes in Facial and Body Feature Prefer­ences Across Social and Fconomic Con­ditions." They used PMOYs' dimensions as representative of the type of girl one desires and compared that with how the economy did that year. They concluded that when money is tight you and Hef se­lect less-curvy girls. But if the start of 2009, in the economy and Centerfolds, is any indication, the latest Playmate curve may diverge from their chart.
200050_20090301_000118.xml
article
114
114
Article
News and Notes
FLASHBACH
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Five years ago this month we introduced you to Sandra Hubby. She jumped off her tractor and made it to Cleveland for our 50th Anniversary Playmate search. Though she had to leave her horse Angus on her farm, her newfound fame as a Playmate led to exciting experiences, such as being photographed by Pharrell, who, as a celebrity lensman, shot her for the Cyber Club. These days she's happily back in the Ohio countryside, working in a local law office.
200050_20090301_000119.xml
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Article
News and Notes
DID YOU KNOW?
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PMOY 1994 Jenny McCarthy's beau, Jim Carrey, says he doesn't want to jinx their relationship by getting married.
200050_20090301_000120.xml
article
115
115
Article
News and Notes
MY FAVORITE PLAYMATE
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JASON MEADOWS
—UMI Music Award nominee
200050_20090301_000121.xml
article
115
115
Article
News and Notes
BYE-BYE, BETTIE PAGE
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The most celebrated pinup queen in history. Miss January 1955 Bet-tie Page, passed away in December, liertie was the perfect Playmate, as we've noted before, be­cause she could be both naughty and nice. She was a vision in black, her raven hair—with those iconic bangs— flowing to her porcelain shoulders. Her fearless fetish images helped broaden America's sexu­al palate and open new doors of sexuality to mainstream guys and girls next door. "She was a remarkable lady," Hef says, "someone who had a tremendous impact on our societv. " Years ago
200050_20090301_000122.xml
article
115
115
Article
News and Notes
MISS JUNE 2008 WRITES
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Juliette Irene lauded Diablo Cindy's book Ciiilily (.'•nl in /./'/. & Music Rcricii1. She pointed to Cody's abil­ity to bridge the gap between two types of women: "Just as strippers balk at being stereotyped as amoral, damaged sluts, no 'civilian" woman wants to be thought of solely as obe­dient, sexless and wholesome."
200050_20090301_000123.xml
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Article
News and Notes
OUT AND ABOUT WITH...
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200050_20090301_000124.xml
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ESCORT
RADAR AND LASER EXPERT
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200050_20090301_000125.xml
article
117
117,118
Article
The Playboy Forum
START MAKING SENSE
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JOE DOMANICK
ITS EASY TO PLAY TO THE NATIVIST CROWD. TO ADVOCATE FOR POLICIES THAT ARE GOOD FOR AMERICA
200050_20090301_000126.xml
article
118
118
Article
Forum
WHY THE FORUM MATTERS
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We all have hopes and dreams. The Playboy Forum is -devoted to keeping these hopes and dreams alive by ' fighting for basic freedoms, explaining why those free­doms are so important—not only to us but to you—and pointing a finger when those freedoms are trampled. As part of the redesign of Playboy.com, we're happy to an­nounce the launch of a dynamic digital version of The Playboy Forum. It's a logical next step for a section that has always been about openness and interactivity and fostering'an impassioned back-and-forth discussion with our readers. The Forum first appeared in the magazine in July 1963. From the start it has served as a colloquium between editors and readers on mat­ters of freedom of speech and sexual rights. As the section has expanded over the years, it has contin-
200050_20090301_000127.xml
article
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Article
Forum
AMERICAN PEON
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GUEST-WORKER PROGRAMS DON'T HELP WORKERS
200050_20090301_000128.xml
article
120
120
Letters to the Editor
Forum
NOT MADE IN USA
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1 feel compelled to respond to Kevin Phillips's "We Can't Make It Here" (December). The piece covers many of the reasons we are in the mess we're in, but it leaves a few out. One reason we no longer manufacture things in America is that we have laws to protect our workers and to limit pollution of our air, water and land. Many other manufacturing countries lack comparable protections. Pollution from China stretches across the Pacific Ocean and blankets the U.S. Some companies, seeing an opportu­nity to profit at the expense of people and the planet, decide to move their manufacturing jobs to countries where oHicials can easily be bribed to look the other way while the businesses pollute with impunity and shamelessly exploit those nations' workforces. Want to try to organize a labor union in China? You'll end up in jail. Want to try to get environ­mental laws passed? In some countries you'll be shot on the spot.
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Letters to the Editor
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TO VOTE OR NOT TO VOTE
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One reason not to vote that was over­looked in "Get Out the Vote" (Novem­ber) is that you're less likely to be called for jurv dutv. I know Deoole who
200050_20090301_000130.xml
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EXCHANGE OF FIRE
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I was struck by a 1974 quotation by Hef revisited in January (Pltiylxiy Intfrview's (imili'sl Hits): "There is an enemy out there. This country—indeed, the whole world—consists of two opposing forces: us and those who would force their own values and attitudes on us." 1 would say. in accordance with this beliel, imayboy should oppose further gun-control measures, which force an attitude on all of us.
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COMPASSIONATE CONSERVATIVE?
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I was disappointed that you published Aaron Rogers's letter in the December issue. Rogers paints Barry Goldwater as a racist, trigger-happy psycho who was hated by all. Nothing could be fur­ther from the truth. Goldwater. who retired from the Air Force Reserve as a major general, was chief of the Arizona Air National Guard in 194(5, when he demanded the unit be desegregated. Moreover, he supported the NAACP in Arizona and voted for every civil rights bill prior to the 1964 Civil Rights Act; he opposed that act because he believed it was unconstitutional. As for advocat­ing "bombing North Vietnam back to the Stone Age with nuclear weapons," again Rogers is mistaken. Goldwater recommended using low-yield nuclear weapons, not bombs, to defoliate the dense forests. All this reminds me of a saying that became popular a few years after Goldwater's loss to LBJ in the 1964 election: "They told me that if I voted for Goldwater, we'd have a war in Southeast Asia, civil and racial unrest and a ruined economy. I voted for him anyway, and it turned out they were right." It is unfortunate thai even after all these years, there is such misguided hatred toward Goldwater, especially when all those who met him seem to have liked him. In fact, one of his closest friends in Washington was
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Tune In, Turn On, Kick Ass
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london-Writing in the journal Na­ture, a group of American and British academics and scientists published a "call for a presumption that mentally competent adults should be able to engage in cognitive enhancement us­ing drugs" such as Ritalin, Adderall, modafinil and others. "Human inge­nuity," the article reads, "has given us the means of enhancing our brains through inventions such as written language, printing and the Internet. Most authors of this commentary are teachers and strive to enhance the minds of their students, both by add­ing substantive information and by showing them new and better ways to process that information. And we are all aware of the abilities to enhance our brains with adequate exercise, nutrition and sleep. The drugs just re­viewed, along with newer technologies such as brain stimulation and pros­thetic brain chips, should be viewed in the same general category as education, good health habits and information technology— ways that our uniquely in- novative species tries to improve itself."
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Rated Mature
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kansas ciiy. Missouri Mrter studying now sex is addressed in nursing homes, re­searchers from Kansas State University have put together a series of seminars to educate workers about how to han­dle sexual topics with older adults in their care. "It was liberating to some folks to have an open discussion with university researchers," says Lillian Claassen, a health services administra­tor at a home in Hesston, where the re­searchers offered a training session. "It empowered people to think about how they could help folks." That's a good thing—and long overdue, particularly with the number of sexually progres­sive baby boomers on their way to such facilities in the near future. As Gayle Doll, the director of KSU's Center on Aging, points out, "Nursing homes are the second-most-regulated industry in the country, behind nuclear power plants. But none of those regulations address sexuality. Consequently, no one knows how to handle it."
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Campus Clampdown
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east lansing. Michigan A Michigan State University student who sent an e-mail asking 391 faculty members to com­ment on a proposed change in universi­ty policy was found guilty by the school of unauthorized use of a university net­work, or spamming. "MSU's decision defies the First Amendment, fairness and common sense," says Adam Kissel of the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education. "MSU is effectively pre­venting the campus community from sending e-mails criticizing the adminis­tration to more than an extremely small fraction of the MSU community. The university should be ashamed, and the president should immediately overturn this illiberal finding."
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Windows on the World
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Chicago hactory workers at Republic Windows and Doors staged a sit-in after management shut the facility down, blaming its lender, Bank of America, for the company's inability to pay severance
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Terminator Time
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Washington, d.c. A new generation of military robots will be increasingly autono-
200050_20090301_000137.xml
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Grapevine
One Whale of a Tail
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It's no secret HEIDI MONTAG had a boob job and a nose job. This past April we heard she was considering gluteal augmentation surgery—yes, a butt job. Did she or didn't she? You be the judge.
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Grapevine
First Among Equals
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braziuan AUKIANA LIMA won the Victoria's Secret fashion show. Well, it's not really a competition, but we can print only one picture, and we figure this is the best. We know be­cause we looked at all the photos. Every single one. Again and again. And got paid to do it.
200050_20090301_000139.xml
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Grapevine
Who Needs Lines?
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Snow queen MALLOY MARTINI is in Van Wilder 3. "I play a Christian sorority girl." she says. "They're called DICK, Daughters in Christ's Kingdom. I don't really have lines, but I do have a scene where I fake an orgasm in church."
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Grapevine
Ebony and Ivory...
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GABRIELLE UNION: ...live together in perfect harmony. JOSIE MARAN: Side by side on my piano keyboard. Oh, Lord, why don't we? UNION: What, live on a piano keyboard? That sounds uncomfortable.
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Pop Goes the Jesus
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In 200116-year-old Katy Hudson, child of two pastors, released an album of contemporary Christian music. Today she's better known as KATY PERRY, girl kisser and bodice buster. Praise be.
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Grapevine
Run, AnnaLynne, Run
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I he very lovely ANNALYNNE MCCORD is fast becoming a Grapevine favorite. Long eyelashes, regal cheekbones, tousled hair, full lips, gleaming teeth, toned thighs—what
200050_20090301_000143.xml
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Grapevine
Daddy Happy. Daddy Very Happy
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Thai boxing's dean's-list collegian JULIA ZABRODINA tells us she's excited to be in playboy because "it's my dad's favorite magazine, and it's important to make ] Daddy happy."
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Next Month
NEXT MONTH
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INTERNATIONAL PLAYMATES-IRYNA OLHOVSKA, VIKTORIA METZKER AND MAI-LAN LEENDERS ARE ALL HOUSEHOLD NAMES IN THEIR HOME COUNTRIES. IN APRIL THEY'RE COMING TO AMERICA. THIS IS THE KIND OF IMMIGRATION WE CAN ALL GET BEHIND.
200050_20090301_000145.xml
advertisement
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Display Ad
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White Rock Distilleries, Inc.
Vodka
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advertisement
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Camelsnus
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200050_20090301_000147.xml
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Back Cover
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your cigarettes may get jealous.
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