Johnny Bob, Nootka author, returns to these pages after many winters of silence. The Athabascan annalist refuses to reveal where he was all that time, affecting a grave air of mystery about it all; but suspicion prevails that he simply has amnesia for the whole period, which he may have spent trying to perfect the smoke signal as a literary form.
Please explain to me what a dope connoisseur like “R.” is doing writing about an Eastern physical discipline instead of writing about dope like he's supposed to. Steven Bush, Columbus, Ga. “R.” replies: “A true connoisseur must train himself to savor all sorts of highs.
Jamaican weed is an emotional high. You feel there's more to Jamaica than steel drums and reggae rhythms.
I’ve been wanting to write a column about Jamaican weed for a long time. Big hitch: no Jamaican. But, none. People weren’t even trying to fake it, the way they will sometimes, with Thai and Hawaiian. Nobody would believe it. And so at first when people would pass me a joint of something they called “Jamaican," I’d be skeptical.
Proceed cautiously in the beginning of December. Be wary of others. Your ambition will provoke their suspicion, and your running sores, their disgust. If you're an Aries, Cancer, Libra or Capricorn, this could be a frustrating time. December 3 you'll find yourself thinking, walking and eating fast.
When customs dogs at Kennedy International Airport sniffed the luggage of seven-year-old Jason Newman last March, a conditioned response clicked in their canine skulls, and they alerted their human masters that something was amiss. Inside the valise, inspectors discovered 11 pounds (actually 8, according to HIGH TIMES sources) of high-grade ganja—a small bust by modern standards, but banner headlines when the bustee is a child.
DEFENSE DEPARTMENT TIGHTENS CONTROL OF SURPLUS PLANE SALES
BIDDING TO BE MONITORED BY DEA
HASTY D.O.D. ACTION MAY LEAVE LOOPHOLES
In an effort to stop supplying planes to the international smuggling trade, the U.S. Department of Defense has issued new administrative rules aimed at keeping track of all surplus aircraft long after they’ve passed from government possession.
On July 18 the Drug Enforcement Administration announced that its Paris regional office was being recalled to Washington as part of President Carter’s overseas costcutting. This leaves the DEA with just two regional offices outside the United States, those in Bangkok and Mexico, which are also due to be recalled in coming months.
DUBUQUE, IOWA—Alcoholism is a physically based behavioral disorder that may, in many cases, actually be hereditary, researchers at the University of Iowa have conclusively determined. Dr. Remi Cadoret, a psychologist, has found that children born to alcoholic parents, raised from infancy in foster homes, are statistically more likely than other foster-reared children to develop alcoholic syndromes in late adolescence.
Canadian police and army officials off-loaded 33.5 tons of grade-A weed early this year at No Name Bay in the biggest Canadian pot snatch in history. To the astonishment and chagrin of prosecutors, the entire ship's crew of 16 Colombians and 7 Americans was ultimately acquitted and set free after a high-powered panel of five defense attorneys managed to sell a "defense of distress" to a sympathetic jury.
The same censorship board that makes it a crime to read HIGH TIMES in perpetually uptight South Africa has slapped the clamps on Pink Floyd's hit recording of “The Wall” Student demonstrators against racial discrimination had adopted the song’s lyric, “We don’t want no education; we don’t want no thought control,” as a slogan in a nationwide school boycott.
IRVINE, CALIFORNIA—Teachers get along better with hyperactive children who've been medicated with methylpheni-date (Ritalin) than they do with unmedicated hyperactive children, a study at the University of California here suggests.
SCIENCE MAG BLOWS WHISTLE ON CHROMOSOME-BREAK SCARE
NEW YORK city—"It’s a scary thing to tell people they have chromosome breaks,” says Dr. Arthur Bloom of Columbia University. “But the breaks are by no means a harbinger of cancer or birth defects.” Ironically, Dr. Bloom’s comment on the negligible significance of chromosome damage appeared in Science magazine last summer almost simultaneously with a two-day “drug-abuse seminar” held at Columbia, largely organized and moderated by Columbia anesthesiologist Dr. Gabriel Nahas.
Laws get made and unmade largely in response to various pressure groups or organized campaigns. In the case of the marijuana industry, we growers have a lot at stake in the issue of legalization, and so do the economies of the areas in which we are concentrated.
Globetrotters, Englishmen and readers of this column are probably aware by now that next to the United States, Australia is the secondmost dope kingdom of the world. It has to do with the frontier, fun-loving atmosphere in Aussieland, which also consumes more alcohol per capita than most countries.
Recently I caught sight of a memo posted in a hospital emergency room concerning juveniles and drugs. The hospital administrator advised that police be notified whenever a juvenile was treated in connection with drug use. Buried within the memo, in smaller print, was the stipulation that such notification be made at the request of the emergency physician on duty.
Henry Kissinger thought he suffered nothing more than a nasty bump on the head when he fell off a platform before delivering a speech in St. Louis earlier this year. But the subsequent abberant behavior exhibited by Dr. K. has got Washington insiders wringing their hands.
Women in White High Times interviews two lady coke dealers
Cocaine has always been pictured as a male-dominance drug. In classical Peruvian times, it was the top Inca honchos who smugly chewed their coca cuds while the virgin maidens of Riobamba and Titicaca were sacrificed in gaudy fertility ceremonies to ensure an abundant harvest for next season's crop.
So I go into pro ball and spend the next nine years being a blacksmith, until my body breaks down from all the punishment it takes. What mainly happens is they cut my knee up twice, but also I take so many slaps on the helmet and kicks in the groin and busted noses and knuckles and cheekbones and what have you that by age 28 or 29, I am no longer my young, spry self; and no longer worth much as a player.
It was the early '60s at a Chicago nightclub called The Blind Pig that I first met Joe Lee Williams. He was a short and stout and heavy-chested man, and he was old even then. He wore cowboy boots and cowboy hat and pleated pants pulled way up high, almost to his armpits.
Christmas: Tinsel, eggnog, mistletoe, righteous blow. 'Tis the season to be jolly. Wait, let's qualify that. 'Tis the season to be jolly if you're not suffering from glaucoma or multiple sclerosis, or undergoing chemotherapy, or struggling with any of the other crippling diseases for which marijuana is an illicit palliative.
It wasn't hard to coax our December centerfold nose-mate into revealing her all for our photographers, but it was complicated. We found ourselves compelled to whisk her, disguised as a mere shakerful of salt, onto the grounds of a topflight private college campus, right under the eager noses of hundreds of undergrads who might very well have rioted en masse just to get a whiff of Candy.
It was the day before Christmas, the holy day of Christians everywhere, and widely celebrated in America. Johnny Bob, Indian author, had come to the attention of Hollywood. Johnny is the first to admit that as an author he is unfamous. Nevertheless he was still important to Hollywood because it meant that the man who had found him, Sheldon, had a real eye for talent.
Ever since those three old farts saddled the baby Jesus with all kinds of frankincense and myrrh, people have been giving each other gifts at Christmas. Now, while it’s swell to get presents, it’s always been a drag to give them. Sure, Jesus said it’s better to give than to receive, but what did that cost him, it was his birthday!
Some people don't like Hawaiian growers. They say they're too cocky and arrogant. 'Cause these "big island" farmers don't offer opinions on why they grow the best crop in the world, they offer facts. Facts that run from the inevitable laws of physics to the pseudoscientific notions that betray their hippie origins.
Commander Cody— musician, painter, sculptor and collector—is hardly your ordinary rocker. For one thing, he actually finished art school. "I have a degree in sculpture, you know," says Cody, aka George Frayne. "After college I went to New York like everybody else, but the art scene wasn't my art scene.
BUDGE, UTAH—"I don't care what excuses he comes up with to live with himself," Deputy Sheriff Wallace DeConcini snorts contemptuously. "And I don't care what kind of fancy flimflam his big-shot lawyers come up with either. The fact is, Santa Claus is a hero and a role model for young kids all over the country, and he's got that responsibility to live up to.
Is Every Citizen Entitled to His or Her National Anthem?
OTTAWA, CANADA—Late-night television viewers along the U.S.-Canadian border have traditionally enjoyed a fairly grandiose and prolonged sign-off production every night, incorporating "The Star-Spangled Banner," then "God Save the Queen," and finally "O Canada," all with appropriately stirring patriotic imagery.
SANTIAGO, CHILE—Pressure from Latin American Catholic clerics to appoint more priests in their countries has been answered by the Vatican in a peculiar way: by a drive to transplant North American and European priests in South American dioceses.
United States Sells Out Taiwan, Then Buys Right Back In
TAIPEI, TAIWAN—How does it feel to be sold out by the United States after 30 years of pledges of unyielding loyalty? "What the hell, who needs them anyway?" shrugs a Taiwanese engineer after two years of "derecognition" by the United States.
26 FIELD MARSHAL VISCOUNT MONTgomery: I don't use either alcohol or tobacco, and I'm 100 percent efficient. Winston Churchill: I use both, and my efficiency is 200 percent. Attributed to Churchill and MONTgomery on the occasion of their first meeting early in World War II 27 ALCOHOL AND TOBACCO DO AWAY with half of mankind but without alcohol and tobacco the other half would die Men's room graffito, Germany 28 ANCIENT CHINESE WRITINGS REFER TO cannabis as "the liberator of sin"...
You can go to prison for shoplifting, but steal a joke and you get applauded. When Frank Sinatra almost got kicked out of Australia by a union official, Bob Hope told Mort Sahl that the poor guy woke up one morning with the head of a kangaroo in his bed.
Last month we talked about how you can prevent a consent search by saying No at the appropriate moment. But the question is Can the cops search anyway? Can they search your home or car or pat you down without your consent? Without a consent the cops need probable cause, and that brings us around to the Fourth Amendment to the United States Constitution.
Are books a form of drug paraphernalia? If they can bust cigarette papers, can they bust a book that tells you how to roll your own? Probably not, but the safe money in publishing is on books that steer clear of approving anything illegal. Sorry, no Joy of Jaywalking this year.
If Hamlet's soliloquy had been written while Shakespeare was on speed To be, or...you hear me talking, man? You listenin' to me? I mean that is the question! Dig?! Whether 'tis...now get this, Ace, no-bler...in the mind. Shithead, you know what noble is?