Issue: 20070601

Friday, June 1, 2007
June
6
True
147
Thursday, July 23, 2015
5/10/2018 12:17:22 PM

Articles
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Esquire
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0001.xml
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0_2,0_3,0_4,1
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Citi
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citi
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0002.xml
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2,3
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Infiniti
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INFINITI
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0003.xml
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4
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Banana Republic
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BANANA REPUBLIC
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0004.xml
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5
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Movado
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MOVADO
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0005.xml
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6,7
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Dolce & Gabbana
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DOLCE & GABBANA
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0006.xml
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8,9
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Macys
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macys
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0007.xml
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10
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Carelle
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Carelle
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0008.xml
tableOfContents
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11,14
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Esquire
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0009.xml
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Advertisement: Esquire
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Esquire
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0010.xml
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13
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Bvlgari
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BVLGARI
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0011.xml
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15
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Lexus
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LEXUS
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0012.xml
article
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This Way In
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The Sound and the Fury
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In the April issue, we noted the many charms of Hilary Swank and profiled firebrand Republican senator Chuck Hagel. We handed out the 2007 Esky Music Awards, forcing Iggy Pop and Hubert Sumlin into our Hall of Fame. And perhaps most important, we published a story by the first Esquire writer we’re absolutely certain was drunk on the job.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0013.xml
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17,17A
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Polo
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POLO
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0014.xml
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17B
17B
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Advertisement
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0015.xml
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19
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Rolex
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ROLEX
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0016.xml
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20
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Advertisement: Esquire
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Esquire
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0017.xml
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21,21A,21B,21C
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Dillard's
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Dillard's
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0018.xml
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21D
21D
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Borgata Hotel Casino & Spa
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Borgata Hotel Casino & Spa
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0019.xml
article
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22,24
This Way In
EDITOR'S LETTER
Is This Issue Useful?
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DAVID GRANGER
MAN, I HOPE SO. We've been busting our asses to come up with little bits of advice and instruction that might actually improve a man's life. Whether all the little bits of advice you'll find on most of the pages of this issue teach you things you don't already know or not, I know there is one thing that the magazine can be used for.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0020.xml
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Advertisement: Esquire
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Esquire
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0021.xml
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23
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Banana Republic
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BANANA REPUBLIC
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0022.xml
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24
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Ravazzolo
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Ravazzolo
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0023.xml
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24
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Advertisement: Esquire
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Esquire
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0024.xml
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Advertisement: Cohiba
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Cohiba
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0025.xml
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26
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Oris
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ORIS
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0026.xml
article
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This Way In
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Those Responsible
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"I BECAME a professional photographer on 9/11," says Dublin native Joe Woolhead. The former construction worker jumped on the subway the moment the planes hit and headed down to the site with his camera. He brought his work to a photo agency, and it was published in newspapers all over the world a week later.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0027.xml
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27
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Vtech
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vtech
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0028.xml
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28
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Advertisement: Macallan
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Macallan
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0029.xml
article
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29
The Front
Man at His Best
Useful Advice From a Beautiful Woman
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TOM CHIARELLA
<p>As told by MANDY MOORE Take baby powder to the beach to get sand off your skin. Put dryer sheets in your pockets to keep mosquitoes away. And if you always keep two pillowcases on a pillow, it makes it easier to change the sheets if you have a guest.</p>
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0030.xml
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30,31
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Acura: Acura Tl Type-s
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ACURA
Acura TL Type-S
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0031.xml
article
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Man at His Best
THE FRONT
The Leisure Meter
HOW TO ALLOCATE YOUR FREE TIME
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0032.xml
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33
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Louis Vuitton
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LOUIS VUITTON
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0033.xml
article
34
34,36
Man at His Best
THE FRONT THE SCREEN
Acting Nuts
IN BUG, NEWCOMER MICHAEL SHANNON DELIVERS THE SCARIEST PORTRAYAL OF INSANITY SINCE PSYCHO
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MIKE D'ANGELO
IF YOU SAW WORLD TRADE CENTER, Michael Shannon has already startled you. Cutting through the movie’s air of noble restraint like a machete through gauze, he portrayed real-life rescuer and ex-marine Dave Karnes. With the unnerving intensity of a steely-eyed zealot, he sifts through the smoking ruins at night like St. Francis of Assisi crossed with the Terminator.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0034.xml
article
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34
Man at His Best
THE FRONT THE SCREEN
Crazy Love
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DAVID WALTERS
Boy meets girl. Boy loses girl. Boy has lye thrown in girl's face, blinding her for life, and goes to prison for 14 years. Boy gets paroled and marries girl. It’s a familiar yarn—either the plot of one of Nicholas Sparks's early, PCP-fueled novels or the true story of Burt and Linda Pugach, as told in Crazy Love (June 1), an engrossing new documentary by Fisher Stevens and Esquire publicist Dan Klores that premiered at the Sundance Film Festival.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0035.xml
article
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Man at His Best
THE FRONT THE SCREEN
Q&a: Thomas Haden Church
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SARA BLISS
AFTER THE PLUG WAS PULLED on his short-lived TV series Ned and Stacey, Thomas Haden Church bought a 2,000-acre cattle ranch outside Kerrville, Texas, and retired from Hollywood. Except he didn’t. "I don’t know where those rumors came from," says the actor.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0036.xml
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Prada
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PRADA
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0037.xml
sidebar
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If You Travel, at Some
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KATHRYN WILSON
If you travel, at some point you'll come into contact with bedbugs. The common thing is you get home from your trip, dump your suitcase on the bed, take everything out, and put your feet up and relax. If there were any bedbugs hiding in your suitcase, you've now got a problem.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0038.xml
article
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36
Man at His Best
THE FRONT THE SCREEN
The 30-day Forecast: the Doyle Report Beyond the Shits and Grins, What Use Is Entertainment?
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LARRY DOYLE
LITERATURE, of course, can entertain and edify, and stabilize furniture. Music has charms to soothe our savage beast, and drown out the ugly grunts and squeaks of our rutting. And film, some films, can rattle our brainpan, shaking us out of our convenient reality, forcing us, for example, to see what we are doing to this living planet and to make a commitment to die before it gets too bad.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0039.xml
article
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Man at His Best
THE FRONT THE SCREEN
The Complaint: the Shrek Movies
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MIKE D'ANGELO
WHEN FUTURE FILM HISTORIANS comb through the Happy Meal detritus of the 21st century, trying to figure out what killed animation as an art form, will they recognize the corrosive influence of the Shrek movies? Will anybody even remember a time when feature-length cartoons amounted to more than a scattershot mix of pointless celebrity shtick and feeble pop-culture references, plus a few fart jokes for the kids?
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0040.xml
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Savane
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SAVANE
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0041.xml
article
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THE FRONT
Man at His Best
The Man Who Invented 9/11
DON DELILLO HAS BEEN WRITING NOVELS ABOUT CROWDS AND MASS ISOLATION FOR FOUR DECADES. SO WHAT HAPPENS WHEN LIFE CATCHES UP WITH HIS FICTION?
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TOM JUNOD
<p>WITH FALLING MAN (Scribner, $26), Don DeLillo takes his crack at the post-9/11 novel, and, God knows, there’s no one in our literature who has done more to earn the right. After all, he’s been insisting for as long as he’s been writing that humanity has turned into a mass organism, twitching with the plots and conspiracies hatched by loners desperate for connection.</p>
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0042.xml
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The Glenlivet Distilling Company: Nàdurra
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The Glenlivet Distilling Company
Nàdurra
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0043.xml
article
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Man at His Best
THE FRONT MUSIC
Meet Joe Strummer...
THE MOST IMPORTANT MAN IN THE HISTORY OF ROCK (FOR NOW)
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ZAC CRAIN
THE LEGACY PART IS EASY. The cross-pollination of music genres over the past two decades can be directly laid at the doorstep of Joe Strummer, lead singer of the Clash. His ability to make the political personal (check “Straight to Hell” for starters) has plenty of successors but no usurper.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0044.xml
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Man at His Best
THE FRONT MUSIC
Good Music
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ANDY LANGER
DO YOU TRUST YOUR FRIENDS?, STARS A song-for-song redo of the Canadian supergroup's 2004 album, Set Yourself on Fire. that features contributions from the Dears and Apostle of Hustle and leaves you wanting to reexamine the original.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0045.xml
article
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Man at His Best
THE FRONT MUSIC
Underrated Instrument of the Month the Hi-hat
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SCOTT FRAMPTON
THE ROCK LAB COATS in the largely instrumental band Battles have devised a formula for the hi-hat cymbal to take a turn as lead singer. The band, which is releasing its exuberantly experimental first full-length album, Mirrored, has a way of making rhythm and melody so recombinant that the supple opening and closing of the cymbals by drummer John Stanier (formerly of Helmet) can be its most recognizably human component.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0046.xml
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Cadillac
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Cadillac
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0047.xml
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British Airways
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BRITISH AIRWAYS
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0048.xml
article
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Man at His Best
THE GUIDE STYLE
The Italian Shoulder
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YOU CAN TELL a lot about a man by his shoulders. His confidence, his cool, his chances in a bar fight—they’re all right there, wrapped up and written all over the slopes and planes of his upper body. The shoulders of a suit jacket, meanwhile, can be equally telling, and the soft, natural construction found in most Italian suits is a clear marker of a self-assured man who has no use for padding.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0049.xml
article
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Man at His Best
THE GUIDE STYLE
The Four Essential Suits
What every man needs, in the order he needs it
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0050.xml
sidebar
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44
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Antiperspirants Are Great for Helping
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RODNEY CUTLER
Antiperspirants are great for helping you stay dry in your suit all summer, but thanks to the aluminum compounds that make them work, they're also partly responsible for those yellow underarm stains that ruin your shirts. One solution is to wear an undershirt, but if that’s one layer too many, try an aluminum-free deodorant.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0051.xml
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45,46
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Giorgio Armani: Attitud
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GIORGIO ARMANI
ATTITUDE
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0052.xml
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Advertisement: Esquire
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ESQUIRE
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0053.xml
article
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47A
Man at His Best
THE GUIDE STYLE
The Right Fit
How jackets and trousers should break, fall, sit, fit, and look their best
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0054.xml
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47B
47B
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Tumi
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TUMI
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0055.xml
article
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Man at His Best
THE GUIDE THE DIGITAL MAN
Image Matters
YOU'VE GOT THE HIGH-DEF TV. HERE ARE TWO CAMCORDERS THAT WILL SHOW IT OFF.
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BARRY SONNENFELD
I'VE BEEN PRODUCING and directing a television pilot for ABC called Pushing Daisies. It’s about a guy who discovers at the age of eight that he has the ability to bring dead things back to life, but only for a minute. If he lets them live beyond that, they’re alive for good, and someone else has to die.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0056.xml
sidebar
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The Right Lens Will Give
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B. S.
The right lens will give a subtle but distinct point of view to your home movies. The wide-angle end of your zoom is for comedy. Wider-angle lenses have an intrinsic energy about them. As someone leans forward or back in his chair, for instance, he can go from a medium shot to an extreme close-up in a matter of a foot.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0057.xml
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Kendall-jackson
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KENDALL-JACKSON
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0058.xml
article
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Man at His Best
THE GUIDE SEX
Sex
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STACEY GRENROCK WOODS
You mention this word normal. Have you ever considered that maybe your girlfriend spent her summers on her grandmother's dildo farm, where the family would gather on the porch, snapping the fresh crop of butt plugs by the bushel? Have you? Most nonsociopaths agree that a living organism is preferable to an inanimate object, even one with highly realistic raised veins, so if you're unsure about her mental condition, have her complete this sentence: "I like to watch baby animals...” If she doesn't answer "suffer," then you must look at yourself.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0059.xml
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51
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Oceana
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OCEANA
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0060.xml
article
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Man at His Best
THE GUIDE ANSWER FELLA
Smart Mice, Burying Fake Boobs & How to Fudge a Job Interview
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Do mice actually get smarter over time? The traps I’m using no longer work. Mice are bright—sometimes brilliant: witness Steve Buscemi—and if their life span were much longer (the average is a year in the wild, two to three years for a lab dweller), we might all be speaking Squeakish and fretting over our tail size.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0061.xml
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Honda: S2000
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HONDA
S2000
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0062.xml
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54,55
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Raymond Weil
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RAYMOND WEIL
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0063.xml
article
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56,58,59
America
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Radio Is History
In 1980, one song presciently canonized everything that is great about listening to the radio. In 2007, those qualities face extinction.
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Chuck Klosterman
<p>WHEN LIBERAL, SELF-LOATHING AMERICANS travel abroad, they often carve maple leaves into their fleshy jowls and pretend to be Canadian. This, theoretically, makes them seem less rude and warlike when encountering Europeans. Personally, I have decided to adopt this policy of fraudulence at all times.</p>
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0064.xml
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Stella Artois
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STELLA ARTOIS
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0065.xml
sidebar
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This Is a Con I
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C.K.
This is a con I read about twenty-five years ago in Chuck Wielgus and Alexander Wolff’s The In-Your-Face Basketball Book, but it continues to work with unprecedented success: The next time you have to settle a minor dispute, challenge your adversary to a game of rock-paper-scissors.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0066.xml
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58,59
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Westin
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WESTIN
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0067.xml
article
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60
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10 Things You Don't Know About Women
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Minnie Driver
1. When you hug a woman at the end of a date, if you have any romantic intentions whatsoever, do not "bro-pat" her on the back. 2. If you are fortunate enough to have a girlfriend not wear underwear with her sexy black dress, do not announce it at the dinner party when there’s a lull in conversation.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0068.xml
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61,62
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Dolce & Gabbana
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DOLCE & GABBANA
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0069.xml
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63
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Davidoff
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Davidoff
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0070.xml
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64
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Advertisements: Esquire
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HENNESSY
Rio
HENNESSY
Mumbai
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0071.xml
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65
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Hennessy Artistry
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Hennessy ARTISTRY
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0072.xml
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66
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Instant Karma
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INSTANT KARMA
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0073.xml
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66A
66A
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Bell & Ross
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Bell & Ross
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0074.xml
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66B
66B
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Dodge: Dodge Avenger
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DODGE
DODGE AVENGER
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0075.xml
article
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67
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The Road Trip
Eight cars. Seven states. Thirty-six hundred miles. A journey across the automotive landscape in search of answers to life's most pressing questions, like: Will Porsche kill the greatest sports-car debut in decades? Can Toyota get some Texas respect?
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EZRA DYER
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0076.xml
article
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68
THE ROAD TRIP
SAN ANTONIO TO DALLAS
Texas Sushi
The Toyota Tundra is the biggest, most badass truck a Japanese car-maker has ever built. But that doesn't mean Pappy is going to buy it.
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The U.S. truck market is not just imbued by a sense of patriotism, it’s a cutthroat battlefield ruled by brand loyalty. Chevy people buy stickers depicting Calvin pissing on Ford. Ford people buy stickers depicting Calvin pissing on Chevy.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0077.xml
sidebar
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68
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The Concept Is Simple: Create
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CHRISTINE AJUDUA
The concept is simple: Create a roving army of weather and traffic beacons by attaching wireless probes to virtually every car and street corner. The cars will trade information about traffic and road conditions in real time. Everyone agrees that it's a great idea.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0078.xml
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69
69
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Advertisement: followyourfolly.com
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0079.xml
article
70
70
THE ROAD TRIP
WHAT I’VE LEARNED
Tom Lasorda
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[no value]
BRIAN MOCKENHAUPT
These are tough, uncertain times for Chrysler and its CEO, Tom LaSorda. Losses of $1.5 billion last year prompted DaimlerChrysler to put the storied company up for sale. Meanwhile, LaSorda was forced to enact a restructuring plan and lay off thirteen thousand workers.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0080.xml
article
70
70
THE ROAD TRIP
DALLAS TO PHOENIX
Waiting for Evo
Unless Mitsubishi moves some Outlanders, the Evo may disappear. And Mitsubishi, too.
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It’s not often that a carmaker’s fortunes hinge on a single vehicle, but that’s where Mitsubishi Motors North America finds itself with the Outlander. A few years back, Mitsubishi got loosey-goosey with its financing arm. You know the stereotypical used-car ad: “Come on down to Crazy Eddie’s! We’re giving cars away!” Well, Mitsubishi went completely Crazy Eddie—zero money down, zero percent financing, and zero payments for a year.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0081.xml
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71
71
[no value]
[no value]
Brut
[no value]
BRUT
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0082.xml
article
72
72
THE ROAD TRIP
PHOENIX TO SAN DIEGO
Cheap Seats
Twenty years ago, $15,000 didn't buy you much more than a trash can on wheels. Today it buys amazing options, like the Suzuki SX4.
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In 1982, my parents bought a Subaru GL Wagon, a little fourcylinder four-wheel drive that is conceptually similar to the Suzuki SX4 that I’m driving from Phoenix to San Diego. That Subie cost about $8,000, which, adjusted for inflation, works out to more than $17,000 in today’s dollars.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0083.xml
sidebar
72
72
[no value]
[no value]
Joachim Tandler, a German Physicist
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[no value]
[no value]
CHRISTINE AJUDUA
Joachim Tandler, a German physicist with Siemens VDO Automotive, is developing a car that could a) detect side-coming objects in advance, b) decide if contact is inevitable, and c) chemically “shape-shift" to deflect impact and diminish the chance of injury.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0084.xml
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73
73
[no value]
[no value]
Volkswagen of America, Inc.
[no value]
Volkswagen of America, Inc.
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0085.xml
article
74
74
THE ROAD TRIP
SAN DIEGO TO LOS ANGELES
The Second Coming
There was a time when driving a Cadillac was like admitting you couldn't afford a BMW. Not anymore.
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[no value]
Cadillac has a lot going for it these days. Gone are the not-so-distant days of front-wheel-drive STS’s trying to take on BMW and Mercedes and losing badly. But the glaring flaw of the modern Cadillac has been the interiors. A few years ago, I was driving a $50,000 STS that sported interior plastics of such odious, glaring cheapness that at least one non-car-buff passenger pointed at the center console and remarked, “Wow, that looks like crap.”
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0086.xml
sidebar
74
74
[no value]
[no value]
Most of the Damage A
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[no value]
[no value]
TIM HEFFERNAN
Most of the damage a car’s paint job suffers comes in the form of tiny scratches. Historically, automakers sought to solve this problem by creating tougher finishes. But Nissan recently unveiled a radically different approach: a finish that doesn't try to prevent everyday scrapes but rather accepts and heals them.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0087.xml
article
74
74
THE ROAD TRIP
WHY I DRIVE WHAT I DRIVE
Brian Williams
He anchors NBC Nightly News. He's also one of the most serious car lovers we know.
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[no value]
[no value]
After September 11, I leased a Porsche GT2 for two expensive years. My reasoning was simple: A whole lot of people who died that day had expected to live long lives that would unfold like gauzy life-insurance commercials. They assumed that there would be time to buy a dream car that they could nudge up to one hundred miles per hour on the interstate for a brief, thrilling moment, before age and fixed income crept up on them.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0088.xml
article
75
75
THE ROAD TRIP
LOS ANGELES TO LAS VEGAS
Wayward Son
Audi engineered the new R8 to outrun the Porsche 911 GT3, the best car in its class. But what happens if Porsche takes over Audi?
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[no value]
Car-industry consolidation is usually a good thing for consumers. When a more successful company takes over a lesser one—and that’s the way it usually works—the strapped company gains resources that weren’t formerly there. Without question, Jaguar makes better cars now than it did prior to Ford’s takeover.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0089.xml
article
76
76
THE ROAD TRIP
LAS VEGAS TO SAN FRANCISCO
Focus. Please!
Or: A few reasons why Mercedes should stick to what it does best—making really expensive luxury cars
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[no value]
[no value]
The hot buzzword in the car business is focus. In other words, play to your strengths and know your role, rather than trying to offer something for everyone. Ford has sold Aston Martin and is looking to move Jaguar and Land Rover because it wants to focus.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0090.xml
sidebar
76
76
[no value]
[no value]
A Fogged-up Windshield Is As
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[no value]
[no value]
BUDDY KITE
A fogged-up windshield is as dangerous as it is annoying. But thanks to a nanoparticle research crew at MIT, there’s a new glass coating that could eliminate the impediment. Its fog-proof windshield is made by alternating layers of water-loving nanosized glass particles and chemical polymers on top of a normal windshield.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0091.xml
sidebar
76
76
[no value]
[no value]
The Boys at the Oak
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[no value]
[no value]
BUDDY KITE
The boys at the Oak Ridge National Laboratory in Tennessee have cooked up one hell of a buzz killer: a radar-proof speed trap that clocks your mph simply by listening to the sound of your car passing by. Using hidden roadside microphones, the device calculates a car's speed by measuring its Doppler shift-the drop in frequency from when a sound approaches to when it passes.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0092.xml
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77
77,77A
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Gucci: Homme Ii
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GUCCI
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[no value]
[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0093.xml
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77B
77B
[no value]
[no value]
Gordon's Jewelers
[no value]
Gordon's Jewelers
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[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0094.xml
article
78
78
THE ROAD TRIP
SAN FRANCISCO TO PORTLAND
The Savior
What's a car company to do when it's $18 billion in debt? Hitch its future to a new crossover, of course. And pray.
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If the 1980s were all about the minivan and the ’90s were ruled by the SUV, the ’00s will be remembered for the crossover, for the simple reason that drivers want the size and versatility of an SUV with the mileage and handling of a car. Which is good for Ford, since it’s betting its comeback on one.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0095.xml
sidebar
78
78
[no value]
[no value]
The Next Generation of Navigation
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CHRISTINE AJUDUA
The next generation of navigation systems will project your path straight onto the windshield. You won’t have to take your eyes off the road, since your windshield will double as the map. Siemens's version, which should be ready in five to eight years, superimposes your suggested path over a real-time video image of the road ahead.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0096.xml
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79
79
[no value]
[no value]
Samsung: Nv11
[no value]
SAMSUNG
NV11
[no value]
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0097.xml
article
80
80
THE ROAD TRIP
PORTLAND TO SEATTLE
Green Bastard
The next generation of hybrids are being built for many reasons. But saving the environment isn't one of them.
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Hybrids are at a crossroads. They emerged from the primordial ooze looking bizarre and futuristic. But then came the next generation, and a new question emerged: What happens when a hybrid looks just like a regular car? The answer, it would seem, is not much: Ford had to put zero-percent-financing incentives on the eminently normal-looking Escape Hybrid last year, and Honda sold only 5,598 Accord Hybrids in 2006.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0098.xml
article
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80
THE ROAD TRIP
A FEW WORDS ON MAINTENANCE
Renato Ziraschi
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Last year we named Renato our favorite bartender ("Esquire's Best Bars in America," June 2006). He also happens to be a former amateur race-car driver and mechanic. Above, the 1968 Pontiac Firebird 400 that he rebuilt. To me, a car is like a relationship.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0099.xml
sidebar
80
80
[no value]
[no value]
About Twenty-five Years Ago, Bose's
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TIM HEFFERNAN
About twenty-five years ago, Bose's founder, Amar Bose, decided that the science behind his famous speakers could be applied to auto suspension. Instead of shocks, his version would use linear electromagnetic motors connected to terrain-reading sensors.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0100.xml
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81
81
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[no value]
Garmin: Compact Nüvi 200
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GARMIN
compact nüvi 200
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[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0101.xml
article
82
82,83,84,85,86,87
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Pinging Piven
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A. J. JACOBS
<p>Nothing on television today—with the possible exception of Rosie O'Donnell’s nattering—is as simultaneously entertaining and repellent as watching Ari Gold work the phone. He barks into his cell in a tanning booth, while taking a piss, during a haircut, in bed with his wife, in the midst of marital therapy.</p>
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0102.xml
article
88
88
How to WIN A FIGHT
[no value]
The Fistfight: a Primer
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[no value]
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TOM CHIARELLA
Don’t. You are smarter than this. There is too much you can’t control. Even as it starts, know that it will be fast, faster than you could ever imagine and over before you can think much. If it isn’t, then you know you are in the middle of some bad news.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0103.xml
article
88
88
How to WIN A FIGHT
[no value]
How to Avoid Jail
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
TIMOTHY B. ROUNTREE
First, if you're going to fight, don't actually use a weapon. There’s misdemeanor assault and there’s felony assault, and the charges are distinguished by the seriousness of the injury. A pop in the nose? That’s a misdemeanor. But with more-serious injuries, the case is elevated and will play out in court.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0104.xml
article
89
89
How to WIN A FIGHT
[no value]
The Moves
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[no value]
[no value]
CHRIS HALL
How to TAKE DOWN SOMEONE WHO’S BIGGER THAN YOU 1. Knock his hands to one side. 2. When his body turns, put your head outside his front knee and your shoulders into his hips. Wrap your arms just above the back of his knees. 3. Pull in and to the side.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0105.xml
article
89
89
How to WIN A FIGHT
[no value]
How to Heal Yourself
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
CRAIG DAVIDSON
I've taken my licks. Been hit so hard and so repeatedly that I’ve felt the contour of my skull bone buzzing beneath my scalp like an Xray holograph. Punched with such keen malice, It was as if my nerve stem had been packed with dynamite: ba-boom.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0106.xml
article
89
89
How to WIN A FIGHT
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What I've Learned: How to Negotiate
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[no value]
[no value]
RICHARD HOLBROOKE
You have to know what the other side needs. I learned a lot from the twelve years I spent on Wall Street before Dayton. Like the “pay or play” principle. You can play that card only once. You can't keep bluffing or you become Chicken Little. I don't try to go fast.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0107.xml
article
90
90,91,92,93,94,95,96,97,148,149,150
THE REBUILDING: PART 4
[no value]
The Steel
Two hundred thousand tons of steel went into making the World Trade Center’s Twin Towers. Almost six years after 9/11, ground zero, barren until now and buffeted by politics, greed, and grief, is once again filling up with steel. A new skyscraper is going up. The fourth in a series of exclusive reports.
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[no value]
Scott Raab
<p>Governor Pataki, the Father of the Freedom Tower, is running late—twenty minutes, plus or minus five long years—not that it matters any on this fine December morning. A lanky, whey-faced, round-shouldered man with all the charisma of a poached egg, he’s still head honcho of New York State for two more weeks, and this is a special day: George Pataki’s last giddyap at ground zero.</p>
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0108.xml
article
98
98
How to BE A GOOD FATHER
[no value]
First, Lower Your Expectations
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[no value]
TOM CHIARELLA
I hate new fathers. Bunch of arrogant know-it-alls, smug in what they clearly perceive to be the singular glow of the creation of their loins. You have to look at the baby, “talk” to their toddler. I just want to shake them—those fathers. I want to tell them: Kids get hurt.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0109.xml
article
98
98,99
How to BE A GOOD FATHER
[no value]
Trips to Take with Your Kids Before They’re 18
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AMANDA GENGLER
Because when you’re on a raft in a river and everyone has the same size paddle, the parapets between parent and child dissolve. Plus, no cell-phone reception. Choose an outfit that knows how to feed you, like ROW Adventures, in Idaho, Montana, and Oregon (rowadventures.com).
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0110.xml
article
99
99
How to BE A GOOD FATHER
[no value]
How to Teach Your Kid to Throw a Knuckleball
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[no value]
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TIM WAKEFIELD
Grip the ball with your thumb and ring finger, placing the nails and tips of your index and middle fingers inside the horseshoe of the laces. Place the ball against your palm. • I throw it with a really stiff wrist. I let it go with my thumb and ring finger and guide it out with my index and middle fingers.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0111.xml
article
99
99
How to BE A GOOD FATHER
[no value]
How to Calm a Crying Baby
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[no value]
[no value]
DR. HARVEY KARP
The goal: Re-create the continuous sensory stimulation the baby experienced in the womb. THE FIVE S's, IN ORDER: Swaddling (shown): Place baby’s arms at his sides. Fold a big, square blanket using the “dudu” wrapping pattern (down, up, down, up) to ensure a snug fit.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0112.xml
article
99
99
How to BE A GOOD FATHER
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What I've Learned: Fatherhood
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
My mother used to say to me when I was a kid: "I'd throw myself in front of a truck for you. "Over and over again. I didn't know what the hell she was talking about. "What do you mean, you want to throw...you'll die." I say that to my kids now. GENE SIMMONS, ROCK STAR The other night I was walking down the stairs behind one of my daughters.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0113.xml
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100
100
[no value]
[no value]
St. Pauli Girl
[no value]
ST. PAULI GIRL
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0114.xml
article
101
101,102,103,104,105,106,107,108,109,110,114,116
Drinking
[no value]
The Best Bars in America
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[no value]
[no value]
NEELY HARRIS
CHARLES HOMANS
JOHN H. RICHARDSON
PAUL REYES
MATTHEW BELLONI
DAVID WONDRICH
LUKE DITTRICH
JEFF RUBY
ERIN RANDOLPH
CLINT WILLIS
LIZA WARD
JIM MINGE
TIM HEFFERNAN
SCOTT DICKENSHEETS
ZACH ANCHORS
JOHN KENNEY
JOE OESTREICH
KENDALL HAMILTON
<p>The latest installment of our ever-growing franchise celebrating the great bars of America, those harmonious and radiant places that serve us drinks, keep us company, and put up with our regrettable behavior. This is not an overhaul of last year's list.</p>
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0115.xml
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111
111,112,113
[no value]
[no value]
The Patrón Spirits Company
[no value]
The Patrón Spirits Company
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0116.xml
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115
115
[no value]
[no value]
America's Beef Producers
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AMERICA'S BEEF PRODUCERS
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[no value]
[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0117.xml
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117
117
[no value]
[no value]
Camel, J. Reynolds Tobacco Co.
[no value]
[no value]
ROBUST
[no value]
MELLOW
[no value]
[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0118.xml
article
118
118
How to DRESS FOR THE OCCASION
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First, You Have to Want To
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
DAVID GRANGER
At some point in my tenure as a sportswriter, I figured out why big-time athletes disdain the vast majority of reporters. It wasn’t because we were small and weak. It wasn’t because we asked impolite questions and wrote articles they didn’t like.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0119.xml
article
118
118
How to DRESS FOR THE OCCASION
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Things to Carry
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[no value]
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[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0120.xml
article
119
119
How to DRESS FOR THE OCCASION
[no value]
Dressing for the Occasion: Potus Edition
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[no value]
[no value]
SHERYL EBERLY
FOR A TOUR: The White House is the people's house. It doesn't belong to the president and First Lady; it belongs to the people. But that doesn’t mean that we don't have a sense of respect when we're there. Step it up a notch. Nice casual: Trousers or khakis and a shirt (with sleeves).
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0121.xml
article
119
119
How to DRESS FOR THE OCCASION
[no value]
The Super Suit
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0122.xml
article
119
119
How to DRESS FOR THE OCCASION
[no value]
The Rules
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Rule No. 784: People will forgive a well-dressed man anything. Rule No. 790: Men who complain about wearing tuxedos are twice as likely to have a black-tie wedding. Rule No. 815: You can't go wrong with a white oxford shirt. Rule No. 818: Only after the host has removed his jacket or tie can you follow suit.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0123.xml
article
120
120,121,122,123
[no value]
[no value]
Vera Farmiga
The Departed garnered four Academy Awards. She's got four movies coming out this year. But instead of sitting poolside at the Roosevelt Hotel or eating Caesar salad at Chateau Marmont, she spends her days herding goats. Is it any wonder Vera Farmiga is a Woman We Love?
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STEPHEN GARRETT
Two Nubian goats battle with a pair of Angoras to eat sunflower seeds out of Vera Farmiga’s hand. She coos their names—Zoshya and Fruzia—hearty Ukrainian names that recall her own Slavic heritage. “We want to breed them,” she explains. “They’re so horny.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0124.xml
article
124
124
How to GET THE UPPER HAND
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Give a Little, Get a Lot
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[no value]
[no value]
TOM CHIARELLA
There is only one trick to getting more. It is the easiest piece of advice in this entire magazine. It is so blazingly simple that I am going to take an extra sentence or two before I say what it is, only because it won’t seem like much of a payoff if I don’t.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0125.xml
article
124
124
How to GET THE UPPER HAND
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The Rules: Influence
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Rule No. 176: A decent bottle of wine is a fine gift for the host. A nice bottle of port is even better. Rule No. 202: Tipping the bartender unusually well on the first round may get you a faster pour or a free round, but it won't make you George Clooney.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0126.xml
article
124
124,125
How to GET THE UPPER HAND
[no value]
Useful Advice From People Who Can Help You
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
<p>Clerks at Trump International Hotel & Tower; the Ritz-Carlton, and the Waldorf-Astoria, New York City For a better room, just ask when you check in. If one is available, we’ll give it to you. But things like in-room Internet, room service, and premium cable—those are pretty much nonnegotiable things that the clerk can’t control the pricing of or wipe off a bill.</p>
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0127.xml
article
125
125
How to GET THE UPPER HAND
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Highway Patrolman
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Dale C. Carson, former cop and FBI special agent, coauthor of Arrest-Proof Yourself Acceptance of responsibility is key. You want to demonstrate to the officer that not only are you not a threat to anybody, but you behave yourself and you’re a good person.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0128.xml
article
125
125
How to GET THE UPPER HAND
[no value]
Butcher
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[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Show an interest, an appreciation. For the food, I mean. We care about it, and if you show that you do, too, now we’ve got something we both share. And then just ask. So if you really love a great steak, ask your butcher if he’d call you when he’s got an especially good side of beef in.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0129.xml
article
126
126,127,128,129,130,131,132,133
ESQUIRESTYLE
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Toys Are Us
What does it take to survive in the death-defying world of freestyle motocross? The members of california collective Metal Mulisha, led by founder Brian Deegan, take to their bikes and show it all boils down to balls, more balls, and a bold sense of style.
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[no value]
[no value]
The Useful Part HOW TO MAKE A BIG JUMP Try to stay as calm as you can. You might think that getting all psyched up is the way to go about it, but jumping a dirt bike hundreds of feet through the air tends to make you a little more on the shy side of things.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0130.xml
article
134
134,135
What I’ve Learned
[no value]
Bob Barker
GAME-SHOW HOST, 83, HOLLYWOOD
[no value]
[no value]
MATTHEW BELLONI
<p>I did <i>Truth or Consequences</i> for eighteen years. I’ve done <i>Price Is Right </i>for thirty-five years. I did Miss USA and Miss Universe for twenty-one years. I did the Rose Parade for twenty-one years, and I did the Pillsbury Bake-Off for fifteen years. I did the Indianapolis 500 parade for twenty years. I’m a guy who’s kept a job once he got it.</p>
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0131.xml
article
136
136,137,138,139,140,141,142,143,144,145,146,148
[no value]
[no value]
Mercenary
If you learned that the man in this photo—a professional assassin—was the head of security at one of our nation's most vulnerable nuclear facilities, would it trouble you? Or would it sound like one hell of a story?
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[no value]
TOM JUNOD
THE PALISADES NUCLEAR PLANT in Covert, Michigan, is real. It produces 778 megawatts of electricity, and the electricity keeps the lights burning for about half a million residents. The nuclear reactor inside the nuclear plant is also real.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0132.xml
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144
144
[no value]
[no value]
Zappos
[no value]
ZAPPOS
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0133.xml
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144A
144A,144B
[no value]
[no value]
Alterna Eyewear
[no value]
VANQUISH
[no value]
[no value]
[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0134.xml
advertisement
147
147
[no value]
[no value]
Bowflex Revolution: Bowflex Revolution Home Gym
[no value]
BOWFLEX REVOLUTION
BOWFLEX REVOLUTION HOME GYM
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[no value]
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0135.xml
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Rosettastone
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RosettaStone
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0136.xml
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149
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Wwf
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WWF
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0137.xml
article
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Credits
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The Guide, p. 43: Ermenegildo Zegna suit, zegna.com. Luciano Moresco shirt, 212-397-4300. Valentino tie, 800-997-0140. Robert Talbott pocket square, roberttalbott.com. P. 44: Paul Stuart suit and shirt, 800-678-8278. Seaward & Steam tie, britishapparel.com; 800-451-3985. Façonnable pocket square, 877-322-2595.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0138.xml
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Handsome Smooths: Sandtrap
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Handsome SMOOTHS
Sandtrap
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0139.xml
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Athena
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ATHENA
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0140.xml
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Liquid Trust
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LIQUID TRUST
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0141.xml
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The Stuttering Foundation
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THE STUTTERING FOUNDATION
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0142.xml
article
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This Way Out
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The Most Useless Page Ever
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1. Scald the flamingo. Remove feathers. 2. Wash and dress bird. 3. Parboil bird in a pot with water, salt, dill, and a little vinegar. 4. Add leeks and coriander and some reduced must for color. 5. For sauce: In a mortar, crush pepper, cumin, coriander, laser root, mint, and rue.
Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0143.xml
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William Grant & Sons Ltd.: Glenfiddich
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William Grant & Sons Ltd.
GLENFIDDICH
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0144.xml
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Levi Strauss & Co.: Dockers
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Levi Strauss & Co.
DOCKERS
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Esquire_20070601_0147_006_0145.xml